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Random Thoughts
Category: FEATURED
Tags: Joe Paterno Ryan Braun Ed Hochuli Giants 49ers Patriots Ravens Ed Hochuli Prince Fielder

The end of an era?? A ref gets my nod?? Braun tells it like it is?? Fielder not on a team?? Giants, 49ers and more in this edition of Random Thoughts.

Did you expect to see a women every week??

 College football lost one of the greatest coaches of all-time with the passing of Joe Paterno, the longtime Penn State coach who won more games than anyone in major college football but was fired amid a child sex abuse scandal that scarred his reputation for winning with integrity, died Sunday. He was 85.

His family released a statement Sunday morning to announce his death: "His loss leaves a void in our lives that will never be filled. He died as he lived. He fought hard until the end, stayed positive, thought only of others and constantly reminded everyone of how blessed his life had been. His ambitions were far reaching, but he never believed he had to leave this Happy Valley to achieve them. He was a man devoted to his family, his university, his players and his community."

Paterno built his program on the credo "Success with Honor," and he found both. The man known as "JoePa" won 409 games and took the Nittany Lions to 37 bowl games, winning 24, and two national championships. More than 250 of the players he coached went on to the NFL.

He never mention testing positive for a performance-enhancing drug, but National League MVP, Ryan Braun, in a public appearance, to accept his award told a packed room that "everything I have done in my career has been done with respect and appreciation for the game of baseball. You know, sometimes in life, we all deal with challenges we never expected to endure. We have an opportunity to look at those challenges and view them either as obstacles or as opportunities, and I've chosen to view every challenge I've ever faced as an opportunity and this will be no different. I have always believed that a person's character is revealed through the way they deal with those moments of adversity."

Ryan had a stellar season, won the NL MVP in his fifth season, batting .332 with 32 home runs and 111 RBIs, 109 runs scored and 33 stolen bases. He also led the league in slugging percentage (.597).

In a story by ESPN’s “Outside the Lines” Braun tested positive for an elevated level of testosterone in a urine test taken in October. But there are conflicting reports about what caused the positive result, and the New York Times quoted a source as saying a later test showed Braun to have normal testosterone levels.

Before Saturday night, Braun had not spoken publicly about the failed test, but a spokesman for Braun confirmed the result and issued the following statement: "There are highly unusual circumstances surrounding this case which will support Ryan's complete innocence and demonstrate there was absolutely no intentional violation of the program. While Ryan has impeccable character and no previous history, unfortunately, because of the process we have to maintain confidentiality and are not able to discuss it any further, but we are confident he will ultimately be exonerated."

Braun is appealing the result but faces a 50-game suspension at the start of the 2012 season under Major League Baseball's drug policy if the test is upheld. According to The Associated Press, Braun's appeal began on Thursday before MLB arbitrator Shyam Das. If it is unsuccessful, Braun would not be eligible to play again until May 31 and would miss the first 57 days of the regular season, resulting in a loss of approximately $1.87 million of his $6 million salary.

Ironically, MLB commissioner Bud Selig has, on more than one occasion, cited Braun as a clean player and an example of the effectiveness of baseball's drug-testing policy. Braun said he had never been tempted to try them.

"I would never do it,'' he said in an interview with, "because if I took steroids, I would hit 60 or 70 home runs."

I guess we can say, to be continued….


Probably the best two Championship games in NFL history happened this past Sunday.

New England Patriots beat the Baltimore Ravens 23-20. Goat was Billy Cundiff, who missed a field goal to tie the game. Or was he? With 23 seconds left in the game, Lee Evans had a potential game-winning catch in his hands, but was stripped by Sterling Moore with 23 seconds left in the game.

Here is the catch that wasn’t for the Ravens:

Here is the missed field goal:



In an old school NFL classic, the New York Giants beat the San Francisco 49ers in over-time 20-17. The goat in this game was Kyle Williams who fumbled which was recovered by Devin Thomas inside the 30 yard line and the Giants recovered. The G-Men ran a couple of plays and then kicked the game-winning field goal to send them to the Super Bowl.

Here is the Fumble:

For the record:

Let's get off the fuck Billy Cundiff bandwagon. Sure he missed a field goal to TIE the game.

It was Lee Evans who cost the Ravens a chance for the Super Bowl when he caught a pass in the end zone just to have it knocked out of his hands. Did anyone remember that?? It happened 22 seconds before the missed field goal to TIE the game where Evans catch would have WON the game



What went unnoticed during the 49ers/Giants game was the way referee Ed Hochuli handled the game. Sure there was several calls that were questionable like Vernon Davis foot on the line and Ahmad Bradshaw’s forward progress, but what he did was call the game with authority. He also kept football fans informed with what happened and why the call was made on replay calls. Well done ref!!

Does Prince Fielder have bad breath, or body odor?? Why hasn’t anyone signed him by now?? He is in his prime, at 28 years of age (in May), .282 average, 230 homeruns, 656 RBI’s.

Just as I was typing the above, when this came in….

Prince signs a 9 year deal worth $214 million. WOW. I guess this makes the Tigers the favorites to win the World Series.

Is there a misprint in the sport section of my newspaper, The Florida-Times Union? Seem to me it says the Philadelphia 76ers are 11-5 and the Boston Celtics are 7-9. It that true?



Til Next Time








Whip It Out Wednesday
Category: User Showcase
Tags: MLB Tigers Paterno Neil Diamond Fielder Matt Millen

  Hey there ladies and gents, and welcome to a late-night edition of Whip It Out Wednesday with your old pal, IHM. Been a massive couple of days in the sporting world, and we'll dive right into the biggest stories of the day (and the two or three days before). 

  The obvious story I have to cover first is the Tigers' signing of Prince Fielder to a massive 9 year, 214 million dollar contract. Honestly, I love the move... no matter what the defensive rammafications might be. So Fielder plays first base, which takes your old superstar, Miguel Cabrera, out of the fold there until Fielder needs a day off. I could NOT care any less about the defensive side of the ball here. Look at it this way, with or without Prince Fielder in the fold, the Tigers are a mediocre defensive team at best. Without Fielder in the lineup, aside from Cabrera, the LINEUP you trot out there day in and day out is pretty vanilla. Avilia had a good year last year... Peralta was solid, but he hasn't been a consistent hitter in his career... just ask Beeze. Delmon Young is run of the mil for a corner outfielder... Austin Jackson can't get on base to save his life at times. Without Victor Martinez in the lineup, the Tigers were in deep shit... and they knew it. Well, they responded to this issue in a BIG, BIG way by adding a 40 HR, 100 RBI bat. 

  Some people are bitching about the contract... the length and the amount paid. Honestly, neither one phases me. This is a two-year investment. Owner Mike Illitch really probably only has two or three years left at the helm of this team, he's getting up there. He'd like to have a World Series ring to go along with all the Stanley Cup championship rings he's accumulated over the years. He's all in with this team right now, and Tiger fans should be excited! Look, just eight or so years ago, when he was spending next to nothing on the Tigers' payroll, and hadn't in the decade previous he had owned the team, I was among the many calling for him to just sell the damn team already if he wasn't going to invest anything into it. He was dumping cash into the Red Wings left and right, and wouldn't even spend a damn dime on the Tigers' payroll over what was necessary to keep enough asses in the seats. But, this is a new day for Tigers' baseball. It may only last a couple of years, so enjoy it while you can. 

  There are many other flaws with this team, but this addition really helps to cover some of that up. The rotation, 1-3 at least, is among the best in baseball. If guys like Avilia, Peralta, Young and Boesch step it up, this could be a very, very good lineup. The pen is solid, at least on the back end. If you can go out and add another solid starter to the rotation to pencil in behind Porcello, a guy like Roy Oswalt or Edwin Jackson, or even trade Castellanas and Turner to ANYBODY in baseball that has a solid left-handed starter available, I say do it. The future is NOW Detroit. Quit worrying about John Smoltz, he ain't comin' back. You could've had Gio Gonzalez... they wanted BOTH of those players along with another guy, possibly Boesch. You could've had one of the five best YOUNG left handed starters in the game. You blew that opportunity. Now it's time for Dave Dombrowski to make his bacon.

  Make no mistake, this move had NOTHING to do with the General Manager... Mike Illitch stepped into Scott Boras' office alone, bent himself over the desk, and asked him what it was going to take to get Prince Fielder in a Tigers' uniform. As has been the case several times in the past, Boras obliged in fucking Illitch right in the asshole, and taking $214 million over nine years in return. 

  But really, Prince Fielder is only 27 years old. He hasn't played less than 152 games in a full Major League Season. He's free of nagging injuries, and is a guy you can build your lineup around. If nothing else, this thing doesn't work out a year or two from now, Cabrera is likely the guy I'm shipping out of town in return for some major, major prospects or for a quality arm along with a solid position player or two. Even in the long term, this nine-year contract isn't so bad. Awesome move by the Tigers... and something tells me they aren't finished dealing yet. Just a gut feeling you might say. The Cuban Centipede is still out there, and the Tigers are in his top five still. 

  Another major event happened for Detroit and its' fans this weekend that really flew under the radar. Former Lions' coach Marty Mornenwhig has been mentioned as a candidate for the head coaching job in Oakland, and his experience at the helm in Detroit was brought up by many of the pundits out that way. My old pal Matt Millen stepped up to the plate, and finally took responsibility for the God-awful job he did as GM of the Lions', saying Mornenwhig would be a good NFL coach, he just never got the players he needed to succeed under Millen. Way to show you actually have half a pair, Matty boy. About six or seven years too late, and numerous cashed paychecks too late, but it's good to finally hear it come out of your mouth. 

  Super Bowl is set, and I got it half right! Pats and Giants... again... really hoping the Patriots take care of business this time around. If the G-Men pull this thing out, l'il Eli will have a LOT to brag about at the next Manning get together. Hell, he'll have double the number of Lombardi trophies his big brother and father have put together. Here's hoping the Patriots pull this thing off, though. Good God I hate New York. 

  Happy belated birthday to Mr. Neil Diamond. Every time I even hear that name, all I can think of is the Saturday Night Live sketch featuring Will Ferrell as Neil Diamond. 

  Oh yeah, and Joe Paterno died this weekend. A bunch of assholes in Pennsylvania were sad about it, and did some stupid vigil at the statue of that cowardly bastard on Penn State's campus. Rest in apathy, JoePa. 

  That's it for me this time around, folks. Thanks for reading and for any comments you leave on the way out. 

Wrestling Wednesday - news
Category: Wrestling
Tags: WWE Wrestling Make a Wish Foundation

Kingston may be partnered with Mason Ryan. They teamed together last week and beat the WWE Tag Team Champs, Epico and Primo.

Jim Ross was involved in an accident which totaled his car. He is alright. His seat belt and airbag saved him he claims.

This is from the Make a Wish Foundation:

PHOENIX, Jan 23, 2012 (BUSINESS WIRE) — Today, the Make-A-Wish Foundation honored WWE Superstar John Cena and WWE for their contributions to wish kids by dedicating a WWE-themed conference room in the charity’s global headquarters.

John Cena is on pace to grant 300 wishes to kids with life-threatening medical conditions, making him the first celebrity wish granter ever to reach that lofty goal. In 2009, John Cena received the Foundation’s “Chris Greicius Award” for his outstanding efforts on behalf of wish kids.

Recently, John Cena teamed up with Post Foods to prominently display the Make-A-Wish Foundation alongside his image on newly designed boxes of Post Fruity Pebbles Cereal, which are available nationwide through March.

WWE and WWE Superstars have been granting wishes with the Make-A-Wish Foundation for more than 30 years and have donated a significant amount of funds to help cover costs associated with many of those wishes. In addition to John Cena, WWE and its talent have received the “Chris Greicius Award” award four additional times.

“WWE wishes have been popular since early in the Foundation’s history and we are proud to count the WWE and its Superstars as longtime supporters,” said David Williams, President and Chief Executive Officer for the Make-A-Wish Foundation of America. “John Cena’s commitment to our mission and his connection with our wish kids make him one of our best wish ambassadors. We are grateful for everything John and WWE have done, and we look forward to them granting many more wishes in the future.”

John Cena continues to be one of the most frequently requested celebrity wishes. Tonight, John Cena is scheduled to grant two wishes at WWE Monday Night Raw(R) at US Airways Center in Phoenix, AZ.

In the next few weeks I will be putting together some history of the WWE, TNA, championship belts, wrestlers. Feel free to make suggestions on what you want to see.

Anyone interested in Triva??


Buzz from the Bleachers
Category: Daily Blog 2.0

So, if you happened to be listening to our coordinates here in Detroit, MI, you may have heard something like this...

And with that the Detroit Tigers showed that I thought like an idiot last week. Rather than going for a cheap replacement or bringing up young talent (though Jeff did show that while we have good young arms, we are lacking bats on the farm), the Tigers signed Prince Fielder. We didn't just sign Fielder. We sign him for 9 years. We also paid him $214 million. 

Yeah. Dave Dombruski and Mike Ilitch found a spare $214 million laying about. It must be nice. We ranked 10th in MLB in terms of team salary before Fielder. Adding Fielder would roughly bring us over Chicago (AL) to fifth on the list. 

I won't wine too much. I loved watching Prince's dad growing up. Of course, Prince won't have the benefit of old Tigers Stadium like his dad did, but he should still hit a good number and protect our boys. 

Elsewhere, San Fran decided to pay Tim Lincecum. Lincecum signed a two year deal worth around $40.5 mil. He is still eligable for free agency in the off season.

In other MLB news. Jeff's guys in Texas signed YuDarvish, the latest import from Japan, to a six year contract. In light of recent Japanese pitching products, I'd be somewhat nervous here. The Twins picked up former Tiger's flamethrower Joel Zumaya. Jorge Posada decided to call it quits and I saw he finished 9th on the Yankees all time HR list. Crazy thought. At least IHM will be able to watch the All-Star game without bitching about Posada whoring his kids to the camera.

In the NFL, no one had a worse weekend than Kyle Williams of the 49ers. Ted Ginn, Jr was out, so Williams had to step in as the return man. From what I saw, it didn't look like he got much practice. That last fumble showed Williams looking strange holding that ball. Clearly it was tough to watch, like this:

My apologies to Beeze and my dad.

Honestly, though, people need to lighten up on the kid, especially San Francisco fans. Now I don't know if this year's wines were more fermented or had more alcohol content than years past, but those fuckers were violent this year. They have decided to end the year on a bad note by issuing death threats to Williams. There's not much to say to that aside from stay classy, San Francisco.

I also hate to tell people on ESPN anything about sports, but the end of the 49ers game definitely sucked more than Cundiff missing that field goal. Two fumbles on special teams sucks worse in my opinion. Not sure why people are calling for Cundiff to be cut either. He was hitting over 75%. Out of the guys remaining: Tynes hit 79%, Gostkowski was at 84%. Pro-Football Reference has Cundiff ranked 9th. 

Honestly, if one person should be sticking up for Cundiff it should be Lee Evens. If Evens woulda held on, Cundiff woulda been off the hook. Plus, Cundiffs miss pissed enough people off that they forgot about him. 

Finally, there's talk of the Colts getting rid of Peyton Manning. They may do it soon, as he'll be given $28 mil in about a month and a week. Sure, they have a chance to start over with Luck, but I have never been a fan of just throwing a guy in there. Sure you have great recent examples (Cam Newton for one), but there are just as many failures. 

Speaking of failures, many of us have asked: where were the rest of the Colts? We never knew Peyton played on the defense too. Sure, the defense was always a weak spot, but I never thought they were that bad. I don't know how you can make Peyton the goat here, but I guess loyalty left sports when free agency swooped in.

So, that's it for me this week. I've gotta say that as odd as I'd find it to see the AFC hold the Lombardi, I prefer to see the Pats win it. I'm kinda assed out by the re-match angle. Bust em up, Belichek. Thanks for reading as always. I'm off to teach some English at East Detroit High (which is not actually in Detroit). Take care and...enjoy that Pro Bowl. Or college basketball.

eye brocoli, noun

opposite of eye candy, someone unappealing to look at
(how i met your mother) marshall's ex-assistant

barney: "so, who's the eye broccoli?"

marshall: "my new assistant"



Deep Thoughts 1-25-2012
Category: FEATURED
Tags: NFL Playoffs Joe Paterno


Hello and welcome to another Wednesday of deep thoughts. When you read this I will be wandering somewhere in the brush of South Texas. It has been years since I have had the chance to hunt down south and I am excited to be able to take a couple of days and get away from the city. Hopefully, I will have a safe hunt and be back with a few pictures next week. I did not mention it last week, but I was fighting off a case of shingles. I noticed a patch of bumps on my forehead, but did not think anything of it. During the day, the bumps gathered momentum, so I headed to the Dr.  He took a look and said it was shingles? What? Yep, if you had chicken pox as a kid, you can get shingles as an adult. What a crappy deal, the entire left side of my head was so sensitive, it hurt to shampoo my hair. I did find out that you can get a shingles shot...I would highly recommend it!

By now, everyone will have covered Sunday's games. But I feel compelled to say congrats to Patriots and Giants. Both games were hard hitting affairs that tested each winner. It is no stretch that the winners could easily have been sitting on the losing side of the field. A horribly yanked field goal and an inexperienced punt returner will leave the Ravens and 49ers to imagine what might have been. I hate losing, but when you lose a game you could have won, it is difficult to get over. It is probably easier for the 49ers as they were not expected to be there and have a bright future, but they could have won. The Ravens...are a different story. Joe Flacco really did not play poorly, but the fact is he will have to answer questions about not winning; again. Is this fair? Of course not, but until he wins a SB, he will hear the critics say he can't win the big game.

I guess this Super Bowl matchup will make the NFL suits happy. The "experts" will talk about Brady and Belichick winning another championship or they will talk about Eli passing his big brother in SB wins. The truth is that Brady did not play that well against Baltimore and his path does not get any easier with the Giants pass rush. I suppose that the Patriots will be a slight favorite, but I am not so sure. The Giants have a great pass rush to go with a potent offense. The Giants will have to outscore the Pats, and I am not so sure that they won't. I have not been an Eli Manning fan, but he seems to play his best in big games. Many laughed earlier this year when Eli said he considered himself to be one of the best QBs in the league. But with his play this year, he has a valid point. I had Eli as my fantasy QB a few years ago and developed a strong dislike for what he did not do for my team. As much as I hate to say it, the guy can play the position, especially this time of year. 

Tom Brady annihilates mediocre teams, but seems to have problems against good defenses. When the Giants beat New England in their last Super Bowl matchup, the Patriots were the better team. Save for an acrobatic career catch by an average receiver, the Giants would not have beaten the Patriots. Earlier this season, the Giants beat the Patriots without Hakeem Nicks. Welker and Gronkowski were terrific, but the Giants still won. Can the Pats defense stop the trio of Giant receivers? The Patriots defense came to play last Sunday and I suspect that it will take a season best performance for them to beat New York in a couple of weeks. By the way, Vince Wilfork is truly a beast.... 

Like most of you, I wish the Super Bowl was next weekend. Two weeks to hype this event just sucks, but what can you do? 


Hopefully Steven Tyler will not be asked to sing the SSB at the Super Bowl. Was it just me or did Tyler struggle to sing the anthem? This is a judge of American Idol? I know that this song tests the range of many, but damn...










Joe Paterno died on Sunday. So much has happened since last November, that it is difficult to imagine exactly what his passing means. I have never been crazy about Joe Paterno, but I always respected what he stood for. Sadly, this is no longer possible. Many will always remember that Joe did nothing to stop a predator that resided within his program. This is the truth and there is no arguing this reality. There is something that gnaws at my core, however. Joe Paterno gave years of wonderful service to Penn State and college football. Many great young men attended Penn State and learned strong values from Joe Paterno. The values that Joe preached are important for college men to hear. With Joe's passing, I do not find joy or satisfaction; I find only sadness.  I fear the passing of Paterno is a loss of something much larger than this man. What I suspect is that with Paterno's death, we will no longer have a college coach that teaches the right way. College football has become exactly what Paterno dreaded it would. This regular Joe was simple man with a terrific message about life for his players. It is too bad that when faced with a terrible situation, that Joe could not practice what he to speak. Sadly, history cannot reflect Paterno's contribution to college football; his mistake will be all that we remember. 






I am not much for basketball, but this video deserves a nod:





With the Pacers out of town, they thought it might be a good idea to have their mascot (Boomer) visit an area high school game. Boomer did his half time thing, but the result left officials wondering how to finish the game. Luckily, there was an smaller gym nearby to finish the game.




Monday night was the football banquet for the Westwood Warriors. This is the end of the careers for most of the Westwood seniors. It is strange to realize that my son is now a football more year and he will be done. Guys, I can't lie...that last game will be tough. I will be doing a bit of speaking at the banquet, I will be telling this joke:




A friend of mine has fanily that live outside of New Orleans. Her uncle is a police captain in this town and she told me a story recently. There had been rumors of illegal rooster fighting going on, so the captain sent his best two detectives to investigate; Boudreaux and Thibodaux. A few days later, his detectives came back to tell their captain what they discovered. Well captain, they is three main groups involved with this illegal rooster fighting: Dey is tree main groups involve in dis rooster Fightin", he began.

"Good work! Who are they?" the Commander
asked. Boudreaux replied confidently, "De Texas Aggies, de local
Cajuns, and de Mafia from N'awlins".
Puzzled, the Commander asked, "Now Boudreaux, how did you find all
that out in one night?" "Well," he replied, "I went down and done seen
dat rooster fight in person. And I knowed immedjiately dat dem Aggies
was involved when a Duck was entered in the fight."
The Commander nodded, "I'll buy that. But what about the others?"
Boudreaux nodded knowingly, "Well, I knowed de Cajuns was involved
when sum body bet on de duck!"
"Ah, I see, I see....." sighed the sergeant, "And how did you figure
Mafia was involved?"
"De duck won !"




You may have heard that everything is bigger in Texas? I could not believe this when I caught it on the news tonight:












That is all I have for this week, but I will leave you with a bit of Jack Handey to chew on:


The next time I have meat and mashed potatoes, I think I'll put a very large blob of potatoes on my plate with just a little piece of meat. And if someone asks me why I didn't get more meat, I'll just say, "Oh, you mean this?" and pull out a big piece of meat from inside the blob of potatoes, where I've hidden it. Good magic trick, huh?          


I wouldn't be surprised if someday some fishermen caught a big shark and cut it open, and there inside was a whole person. Then they cut the person open, and in him is a little baby shark. And in the baby shark there isn't a person, because it would be too small. But there's a little doll or something, like a Johnny Combat little toy guy---something like that.          


Thanks for stopping by and feel free to leave a few deep thoughts of your own...






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