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Fry Day Blog: We're Doomed!!! The Aliens Have Arrived!!!
Category: Daily Blog 2.0

Welcome to The Fry Day†Blog

Today dvt fries those who think aliens are just as fake as Santa,

the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy,

and the WWE...

And you thought The War of the Worlds was scary...

This is worse...

Much, much worse...

Aliens have landed in our sports world...

And they are here to stay...

And there is nothing we can do about them...

THEY have upset the apple cart...

What a mess we have on our hands...

This worse than Independence Day, the movie...

Life will never ever be the same...

We look forward to that beautiful day every year...

As Andy Williams once sang...

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year...

It's the hap, happiest season of all...

Ding dong, ding dong...

And it sure as heck ain't Christmas...

It's the day the world comes to a stop...

And we use our wit...

And we use our wisdom...

We second guess prior to first guessing...

We anticipate...

We predict...

We are Nostradamusses...

But we might as well be Hippopotamusses...

Or Nostra-doofusses...

At least that is what it has come to...

Colonel Mustard strikes again...

We don't have a clue...

Thanks in part...

Actually...

Thanks in full to the aliens...

For many years we kept them away from our precious world...

Occasionally they would creep close...

Only to be swatted by our big fly swatter...

Sprayed by our giant can of Raid...

But the aliens are now immune to anything we throw at them...

They got close last year...

Scary close...

They're scary closer this year...

Ready to take over...

They Have a Dream...

And it's†to take over...

And they may very well do it this year...

We threw Pitt at them...

The aliens prevailed...

We threw Kansas at them...

To no avail...

Let's face it folks...

The aliens are here to stay...

Like it or lump it...

Call them the Mid-Majors...

Call them anything...

Just don't call them late for the dance...

They will strike from the eleventh seed..

Or even the twelfth seed...

And coming soon to†an arena or big screen near you...

You will see a sixteen disintegrate a one seed...

They have their super powers...

They have their krypton...

They are singin' Jim Croce...

They are tuggin' on Superman's cape...

They are spittin' into the wind...

They are pullin' the mask...

Off the ole Lone Ranger...

You better don't mess around with them...

Last year Butler...

This year add VCU...

Next year???

Who knows!!!

Mercy sakes alive...

They have all of us shrugging our shoulders...

How do we do our brackets next year???

Do we act like the office secretary???

And see which coach has the cutest butt???

Those are pretty uniforms...

I think I will pick them...

I just love Bulldogs...

They're so cute...

Might as well...

Now the question...

Who's to blame here???

Why do we have all of this disruption???

Simply put...

Someone put too much water in the concentrate...

See what happens when talent flies the coop...

After the "true" freshman year???

I don't blame them...

I don't blame anybody...

We just gotta live with it...

Get that spare bedroom ready...

The aliens need a place to hibernate until next March...

dvt

PHOTO

†http://www.crunchgear.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/sin-city-death-row-marv-electric-chair-figure.jpg

http://www.newanimal.org/alien_asgard_stargate.jpghttp://farm5.static.flickr.com/4052/4608433032_347c06db09.jpg

http://www.billboard.com/images/album_images/cov200/pop/cov200/dre200/e260/e26098l4g2p.jpg

http://uploads.neatorama.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/694px-Nostradamus_prophecies.jpg

http://image42.webshots.com/42/3/70/72/304837072QceLyC_fs.jpg

http://www.timesocket.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/01/mlk.gif

VIDEO

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njvgjZbjoR4

Talking Sports (Openning Day Edition)
Category: Daily Blog 2.0
Tags: MLB

Hello, Hello, Hello Happy Thursday but an even Happier Baseball Season. My players are ready to perform with a huge amount of stats. Oh wait thatís fantasy baseball... Letís get it right. The freshness of green grass and the smells of hot dogs at 9 bucks a pop they turn into real wieners. I mean the smell of hot dogs and peanuts $47.50. I mean letís try this again the smell of hot dogs and peanuts in the air. The juice from the ball and the cork of the bat. Wait thatís not right letís try again. I mean the crisp sound of a round ball striking a round bat. And the deafening crack that goes with it.

Just having some fun itís baseball season once again and the fun begins. Who will be the VCU and Butler this year. Are the Red Sox the Jets of MLB already to head to the World Series. Are the Phillies going to be their foe. Both look great on paper but thatís on paper.

Could the Phillies be challenged by the Braves very easily with a Tomahawk Chop. Or will the Marlins prove they are big fish in the pond.† The Mets may have to go and ask

For a bailout because their debt is bigger than the National debt. The Nationals spent lots of cash typical of Washington and they may also get nothing in return which also maybe typical of Washington

†How about the trendy pick of last year in the Central the Brewers(explain to me why they are in the NL). Not if the Reds have their say about anything as the new big red machine emerges.. Will the Cardinals bounce back or will they simply whistle sweet tune.. Will the Cubs grow into Bears or will the remain in habernation. The Astroís will they gravitate to the top or just float harmlessly in space. and will the Pirates simply remain shipwrecked without Jack Sparrow. Itís a Pirates life for me unless your in Pittsburgh.

In the West will the World Champs repeat or will the Padres find some heavenly guidance. Will the Diamondbacks find the Cobra from the San Diego Zoo and spoy some venom bringing the Giants down like Jack cutting the beanstalk. Or will some Sun simply shine down on them in the dessert. Will the Rockies head down a Rocky path one wrong step they could easily turn into an avalanche. Or will the make it to the summit.

In the American League, Hamilton has replaced Walker as the Texas Ranger and will they make it back to get some Justice (Not Dave who is long retired). Will the Angels get some divine intervention and face the padres in a heavenly match in October or will the evil spirits of all hollows eve have other ideas like the Yankees. Maybe the athleticism of the Aís turn into track meet because they always say itís a Marathon and not a sprint. The Mariners seem lost at sea will they find their way. Or will they drift and float.

In The Central Will it be a couple of brothers from the St Paul area our will the Tigers take a bigger bite than they did out of Penn and Teller.. Perhaps the White Sox plan to get in the mix and get a little dirty however not as dirty as the Black Sox because if they were to get that dirty there would need a Bonds to get them out of that bind. We all know there is nothing clean about the Bonds which I refer. The Indians maybe sending smoke signals from help but that wonít come from the Royals because the only ring they will see are the oneís †that Willie and Kate exchange

That brings us back to keeping our Sox on thatís Red Sox but if the Yankees have anything to do with it that Red will be blood. The Blue Jays may swoop in as well as the Orioles who may make a pigeon proud by doing nothing else but pooping on the Red Sox parade. The Rays may also be in this thing because they wonít swim peacefully like Manetas.

No mater your team best of like its baseball season and all seem fresh and bright unless youíre dealing with the local little league.

Other Stuff

Had a great lunch with Sully and Moe, even Mrs. Lanz showed up . You know her as Scout 318 from her TSN Days.

Rants and Raves
Category: FEATURED
Tags: Buck Showalter Derek Jeter Boston Red Sox New York Knicks Carmelo Anthony New Jersey Nets WrestleMania


 

Melo not listening?? Buck Showalter lets it all hang out?? A-Rod does a good deed?? Do I have anything else to say?? Its here in this edition of Rants and Raves.

Sorry this is a short one. Gearing things up for my annual WrestleMania Party. 16 people will be attending and coordinating who’s bring what is a chore, considering they work during the day and I work at night. Makes for a long day. I hope you all get a chance to read my WrestleMania predictions which I posted Wednesday. Last year I went 7-2. I also would be interested to read who you think will win at this years event from Atlanta, Georgia.

The blog is located at:

http://www.yougabsports.com/pt/Wrestling-Wednesday---My-WrestleMania-XXVII-predictions/blog.htm

 

Maybe it’s a good thing the Nets didn’t trade for Melo. In a losing effort to Milwaukee this past Saturday, it seemed that Anthony wanted nothing to do with the Knicks bench after a time-out. He stood away while the rest of the players were listening to the coach. Its not like this hasn’t happened to Carmelo before. He very rarely listened to Coach Boeheim while at Syracuse.

 

What does Buck Showalter have in common with Derek Jeter and the Boston Red Sox? Nothing, Zero, Zilch!! Wow wee, what’s even more surprising is Buck Showalter being aggressive with his mouth. In an article in Men’s Health, Showalter had the following to say about Jeter:

"The first time we went to Yankee Stadium, I screamed at Derek Jeter from the dugout," Showalter said. "Our guys are thinking, 'Wow, he's screaming at Derek Jeter.' Well, he's always jumping back from balls just off the plate. I know how many calls that team gets -- and yes, he [ticks] me off."

And then on the offensive against the Red Sox:

“I'd like to see how smart Theo Epstein is with the Tampa Bay payroll. You got Carl Crawford 'cause you paid more than anyone else, and that's what makes you smarter? That's why I like whipping their butt. It's great, knowing those guys with the $205 million payroll are saying, 'How the hell are they beating us?"

-- Orioles manager Buck Showalter, quoted in Men's Health

 

You think the Yankees and Red Sox aren’t waiting for the Orioles???

 

It’s not often that you read about Alex Rodriguez doing a good deed. Its usually because he’s got his foot in his mouth. But, he did the good deed last weekend when he invited Julianne Ramirez, and her family, of Tampa to a Yankee game. A-Rod spoke to the youngster for 25 minutes. Last year, Julianne notice a 3-year-old friend Bella Villa had stopped swimming and was sinking underwater at a pool party. Ramirez rescued Villa from the pool, and having learned CPR in the Girl Scouts, began chest compressions on the youngster. Rodriguez surprised Ramirez with a phone call about 25 minutes before the Yankees played the Pirates. He extended the invitation for a game against Minnesota in Fort Myers. "I have a little surprise for you," Rodriguez told Ramirez from an office phone near the clubhouse. "We would like to invite you to a game tomorrow as our special guest. Would you be interested in coming down and watching us?" Ramirez quickly said "yes" and added "thank you." "We're going to make sure that it's a very, very special day and a day you'll never forget," Rodriguez replied. "We're very proud of you. It's a remarkable story and it's one that I shared with my teammates. I'm inspired by it and can't wait to hear more about it, and really enjoy a great day with you tomorrow." The Yankees and Twins honored Ramirez in a pre-game ceremony at Minnesota's spring training home this past Sunday.

 

Joined my first fantasy baseball league last week. Had the draft this past Sunday. Got $400 to spend on 26 players. It was interesting trying to bid on players. Didn’t get everyone I wanted but I am happy with my team.

Thanks goodness baseball is here. Today starts the MLB season and my team gets to lead it off on ESPN. Yankees against Tigers. Go Yanks!!

At least baseball will take away the thought of not having the NFL around come August and September. Right??

 

Pictures by : Derek Jeter - zillow.com, A-Rod - style.popcrunch.com, Buck Showalter - bohsandos.com, Carmelo Anthony (Knicks) - assets.gearlive.com, Boston Red Sox Logo - minot43.homestead.com 

 

Why Is This A$$hole Still In The NHL?
Category: NHL
Tags: NHL Todd Bertuzzi Matt Cooke Head Shots Hockey High School Hockey The Beeze

 
Yes, I want to know why Todd Bertuzzi is still allowed to play in the NHL...The guy came up through the ranks as a gritty hard-nosed player...He had plenty of skill to go with his size, and grit, but somewhere along the way, he became a piece of shit...

We saw this come to light in 2004, when he sucker-punched Steve Moore from behind, drove him head first into the ice, and broke his neck...He ended Moore's career...Why? Because the Canucks put a bounty out on Moore for a hit he knocked Markus Naslund out with... Moore's hit on Naslund was not ruled illegal by the NHL when it happened...It would be today probably...




But Hockey has always policed itself, and our present day uber-asshole, Matt Cooke went after Moore...They dropped the gloves, and that should have been it...Moore seemed to come out on top... But it wasn't enough for Bertuzzi...




Bertuzzi served a suspension, and apologized and all that crap...But to me, that didn't matter...They way he jumped Moore from behind should have had him booted for good...Since then Bertuzzi hasn't changed his game...He has continued to play physical hockey, and every year he has at least one questionable hit...

Well he did it again this week, with a flying elbow to the head of The Blackhawks, Ryan Johnson...




So how the hell are we suppose to get rid of assholes like Matt Cooke, when assholes like Bertuzzi are still around!?!

And does any of this have anything to do with what happened in a Texas High School Hockey game? I'm not sure I want to open that can of worms yet, but here's what happened...




I love Hockey, and I love the physical aspect of the game, the intentional head-shot shit has got to stop...And guys like Bertuzzi, and Cooke have had their second chances...Now they should be gone...

What do you think?

Later, The Beeze.  

 

Buzz from the Bleachers
Category: Daily Blog 2.0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gr0T9c8SEUk

It's hear once again, Gabbers. Baseball season officially kicks off tomorrow. You'll never find a more sure sign of spring or a more fond reverie. I'm a believer in the spirit and the impact of baseball's history on it's fans. Baseball is made in stories and legends and I look forward to a new season.

Thursday kicks off with a partial schedule of games, three of which can be seen on ESPN or on your FSN affiliate if you live close enough to one of the franchises. Personally, I love the guys that do the FSNDetroit boradcast: Mario Impemba and former Tiger Rod Allen. Rod has a good following here in Detroit and many of my old frat brothers got trashed playing the Rod Allen drinking game while watching the game.

  

Action kicks off with a pair of good games: the Yankees host the Tigers and the Braves at the Nats at 1:05. Of course, you can see the Yanks on ESPN. The Brewers take on the Reds at 2:10. Should be interesting to see what the Reds can do, especially with all the questions and injuries surrounding the Cards. Starting at 4ish, the Angels take on the Royals (who the Tigers open with at home) and the Padres take on the Cards. Cards-Padres will air on ESPN. Opening Day wraps up with the defending champs taking on the Dodgers at 8 on ESPN.

This year, Fox Saturday Baseball will kick off April 2. I always remember spending lazy summer Saturdays as a kid watching This Week in Baseball and then making some hot dogs (boiled, no microwave if I could help it) to watch the game of the week. As a kid growing up without cable, it was my link to televised baseball. Of course, I always had the radio and those Sunday box scores.

On an odd note, I saw a Miguel Cabrerra shot glass for sale. Would make a great gift for my bro. I should buy one for it's ironic value alone. ESPN has also announced that my favorite analyst, Jalen Rose, was involved in a possible DUI. Rose's Escalade was found off the road here in MI with a weary looking Rose still behind the wheel. He refused a breathalyser.

Finally, ESPN was talking about Cleveland today, which lead me to believe that Lebron must've played there. He did and he lost. He got booed. Gilbert wouldn't let his entourage into the parking structure (that's what happens when your boy moves...). I suppose that was a good win for the Cavs and the fans, but it really doesn't change anything. You still have dismal prospects ahead.
 

Though it's a bit long, I'll leave you with a poem by the late, great Ernie Harwell that speaks to the game that we all welcome back tomorrow. Have a great week, Gabbers.

A Game For All America

By Ernie Harwell

Baseball is President Eisenhower tossing out the first ball of the season; and a pudgy schoolboy playing catch with his dad on a Mississippi farm. Its the big league pitchers who sin in night clubs. And the Hollywood singer who pitches to the Giants in spring training.

A tall, thin old man waving a scorecard from his dugout -- that's baseball. So is the big, fat guy with a bulbous nose running out one of his 714 home runs with mincing steps.

It's America, this baseball. A re-issued newsreel of boyhood dreams. Dreams lost somewhere between boy and man. It's the Bronx cheer and the Baltimore farewell. The left-field screen in Boston, the right-field dump at Nashville's Sulphur Dell, the open stands in San Francisco, the dusty, wind-swept diamond at Albuquerque. And a rock home plate and a chicken wire backstop -- anywhere.

There's a man in Mobile who remembers a triple he saw Honus Wagner hit in Pittsburgh 46 years ago. That's baseball. So is the scout reporting that a 16-year-old sandlot pitcher in Cheyenne is the new "Walter Johnson."

It's a wizened little man shouting insults from the safety of his bleacher seat. And a big, smiling first baseman playfully tousling the hair of a youngster outside the players' gate.

Baseball is a spirited race of man against man, reflex against reflex. A game of inches. Every skill is measured. Every heroic, every failing is seen and cheered -- or booed. And then becomes a statistic.

In baseball, democracy shines its clearest. Here the only race that matters is the race to the bag. The creed is the rule book. Color is something to distinguish one team's uniform from another.

Baseball is Sir Alexander Fleming, discoverer of penicillin, asking his Brooklyn hosts to explain Dodger signals. It's player Moe Berg speaking seven languages and working crossword puzzles in Sanskrit. It's a scramble in the box seats for a foul -- and a $125 suit ruined. A man barking into a hot microphone about a cool beer, that's baseball. So is the sportswriter telling a .383 hitter how to stride, and a 20-victory pitcher trying to write his impressions of the World Series.

Baseball is a ballet without music. Drama without words. A carnival without kewpie dolls.

A housewife in California couldn't tell you the color of her husband's eyes, but she knows that Yogi Berra is hitting .337, has brown eyes and used to love to eat bananas with mustard. That's baseball. So is the bright sanctity of Cooperstown's Hall of Fame. And the former big leaguer, who is playing out the string in a Class B loop.

Baseball is continuity. Pitch to pitch. Inning to inning. Game to game. Series to series. Season to season.

It's rain, rain, rain splattering on a puddled tarpaulin as thousands sit in damp disappointment. And the click of typewriters and telegraph keys in the press box -- like so many awakened crickets. Baseball is a cocky batboy. The old-timer whose batting average increases every time he tells it. A lady celebrating a home team rally by mauling her husband with a rolled-up scorecard.

Baseball is the cool, clear eyes of Rogers Hornsby, the flashing spikes of Ty Cobb, an overaged pixie named Rabbit Maranville, and Jackie Robinson testifying before a Congressional hearing.

Baseball? It's just a game -- as simple as a ball and a bat. Yet, as complex as the American spirit it symbolizes. It's a sport, business -- and sometimes even religion.

Baseball is Tradition in flannel knickerbockers. And Chagrin in being picked off base. It is Dignity in the blue serge of an umpire running the game by rule of thumb. It is Humor, holding its sides when an errant puppy eludes two groundskeepers and the fastest outfielder. And Pathos, dragging itself off the field after being knocked from the box.

Nicknames are baseball. Names like Zeke and Pie and Kiki and Home Run and Cracker and Dizzy and Dazzy.

Baseball is a sweaty, steaming dressing room where hopes and feelings are as naked as the men themselves. It's a dugout with spike-scarred flooring. And shadows across an empty ballpark. It's the endless list of names in box scores, abbreviated almost beyond recognition.

The holdout is baseball, too. He wants 55 grand or he won't turn a muscle. But, it's also the youngster who hitch-hikes from South Dakota to Florida just for a tryout.

Arguments, Casey at the Bat, old cigarette cards, photographs, Take Me Out to the Ball Game -- all of them are baseball.

Baseball is a rookie -- his experience no bigger than the lump in his throat -- trying to begin fulfillment of a dream. It's a veteran, too -- a tired old man of 35, hoping his aching muscles can drag him through another sweltering August and September.

For nine innings, baseball is the story of David and Goliath, of Samson, Cinderella, Paul Bunyan, Homer's Iliad and the Count of Monte Cristo.

Willie Mays making a brilliant World Series catch. And then going home to Harlem to play stick-ball in the street with his teen-age pals -- that's baseball.

And so is the husky voice of a doomed Lou Gehrig saying, "I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of this earth."

Baseball is cigar smoke, hot-roasted peanuts, The Sporting News, winter trades, "Down in Front," and the "Seventh-Inning Stretch." Sore arms, broken bats, a no-hitter, and the strains of the Star-Spangled Banner.

Baseball is a highly paid Brooklyn catcher telling the nation's business leaders: "You have to be a man to be a big leaguer, but you have to have a lot of little boy in you, too."

This is a game for America, this baseball! 

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