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Buzz from the Bleachers
Category: Daily Blog 2.0

So, at the risk of stepping of Jeff's toes, I figure the biggest thing coming out in time for this posting is the few details of the possible NFL CBA that the press has been able to get. The plus side to this is that they could end up beating my pessimistic beliefs that we'd miss some games this season. Nice to see both sides on better terms.

If you haven't found the article here's a bulleted list of details I got from

• Players get 48 percent of "all revenue."

• Players' share will never dip below 46.5 percent, under new formula being negotiated.

This seems fair to me. I realize that the players generally aren't putting their money at risk, but they are putting their own health and well being on the line. Many have criticized the players for being greedy, but if the owners can certainly live off what they get from the team. Besides, as you will see later on down the list, the owners don't have to put up much of their own money on the stadium. They get that straight from the local tax base.

While they are playing, and even after, players should be able to benefit from the use of their names and images. Most people are rather shrewd about that and are seldom criticized as much for it.

Odd history note, Charles Darwin took considerable effort to point out that the theory of Social Darwinism had nothing to do with his theory of evolution through natural selection and was quick to point out that he in no way agreed with Social Darwinism.

• Teams required to spend close to 100 percent of the salary cap.

I imagine this is good news to fans of small market teams like Buffalo, but the owners of these clubs are probably sweating it out. It doesn't seem to allow much for future planning and I wonder if it may lead teams to overpay. I imagine most would eat the fine rather than the alternative. What makes it harder for lower bracket teams is that beyond spending close to the reported $120 million salary cap, they'd have to put more money forward in the form of benefits. This may bring about some changes in ownership and I wonder if it may lead to some relocation down the road as the gaps widen.

• Rookie wage scale part of deal but still being "tweaked."

Not sure of any further details here, but I agree with the veterans on this. It was a hard pill to swallow some years ago when Matt Stafford came into Detroit during the height of the recession making around $41.7 million before ever playing a down. A few years before Jamarcus Russell signed a then record $68 million deal with around $31 mill guaranteed. A number of vets, including player rep Kevin Mawae, decried these rich contracts for players that had never stepped onto the pro stage. It is indeed tough to swallow Russell making more than most proven NFL QBs. Should be interesting to see what they can agree to on this issue.

• Four years needed for unrestricted free-agent status. Certain tags will be retained, but still being discussed.

I am not sure what this really says, though I imagine it applies to any new deals and not to existing deals. I believe it calls for a four year minimum. I figure the players want to ditch the franchise tag, as few seem to be pleased when they are placed under it.

• 18-game regular season designated only as negotiable item and at no point is mandated in deal.

Shouldn't even be negotiable in my eyes. I think people should be satisfied with 16 games. Why risk further injuries and stretch rosters even thinner? I hear a lot of talk about shortening other seasons and I don't see why anyone wishes to lengthen the NFL season.

• Full 16-game Thursday night TV package beginning in 2014.

I dislike this as it only serves to pimp the NFL network and get more money out of fans. You get about a minimum of $40-50 even for a crappy seat and have huge contracts with ESPN, Fox, CBS, and NBC, why keep pushing money out of the fans by requiring them to buy your network?

• Owners still will get some expense credits that will allow funding for new stadiums.

The union estimated that revenue will double to $18 bil by 2016. How is that not enough to build your own stadiums? Keep on squeezing.

• Retirees to benefit from improved health care, pension benefits as revenue projected to double to $18 million by 2016.

This is my favorite item that the players are fighting for. More sports need to stand up for their past greats. I can't help but recall the story of George Mikan when I see this. Many hall of famers have recently joined a class action suit against the league. While in these current times, it may be hard to think of pro athletes getting a pension when most people have lost theirs, but these are guys who played before the money got so big. Good to see football recognizing the people who built the game to its current and projected level.

Odd piece of hockey news, as Jagre is reportedly interested in coming back to the NHL. He played the last few seasons in the KHL. The Wings were reportedly suitors, but that ship may have sailed. At 39, he's not exactly a hot prospect and the Wings are old enough as it is. Most folks here are looking for the team to get younger (other than Lindstrom coming back). Jagre is now calling on the Pens. Sounds like a nice use of their money and cap space to me.

The most interesting aspect I've seen about the NBA draft is the Spurs putting feelers out about trading Tony Parker. The Spurs are reportedly talking with The Kings and Raptors about trading up. Seems like breaking that group up was inevitable and Parker is probably the guy you can get rid of that would cause the least imediate impact. I can't help but wonder if the Spurs should have won more, but I fondly remember all they accomplished in the face of the NBA business and the Lakers.

I'd like to close by once again thanking Harvey and Lanz for their recommendation of The Teammates. The book was a great story about baseball and freinships and I couldn't help but agree with the suggestion that modern baseball seems to have taken the air out of teammate bonding anything close to what used to be common. Still, a great story told in a riveting style. I highly recommend it to any Gabbers that have not had a chance to read it and have the time. I imagine it would be even more compelling to all the Boston fans out there.

I leave you as always with the word of the week inspired by Fan82.

MTV affect, noun

When a themed channel goes off course, and ends up turning into nothing but pop culture and reality TV. Some channels that have suffered this are MTV, VH1, and G4.
Due to the MTV affect, Some channels now show endless marathons of reality TV shows, and nothing that has to do with games, music, or what ever the channel was supposed to be about.
Deep Thoughts
Category: FEATURED
Tags: Moises Alou DeShawn Stevenson David and Michael Roth Florida Marlins




Hello all and welcome to another Wednesday of deep thoughts. This has indeed been a very strange year for weather. While many of you battled a cold and wet spring, the southwest has just baked. Normally we get fresh reviving spring rains...but not this year. It has been months since it has rained in Austin. We began to see 100 in May and it has just continued to heat up.




This is what it looks like in the Austin area. Yes it is always hot this time of year, but we don't normally see this until late July or August. It is sad to say, but what we need is a good tropical depression to roll in. By the way, we call this a pond...or stock tank. We call it a mud hole now...

One of the wonderful things about Austin is the many summer water activities we have available on the area lakes. Here is a photo of our water source...Lake Travis:





When full, Lake Travis does not have any islands. With all of the drought in our area, it was especially troubling to see a community discarding water. Here is something that caught my eye today:




Man urinates in water, city flushes 8M gallons 


PORTLAND, Ore. – Call it the big flush.

Because a 21-year-old man was caught on a security camera urinating into a city reservoir, Oregon's biggest city is sending 8 million gallons of treated drinking water down the drain.

Portland officials defended the decision Monday, saying they didn't want to send city residents water laced, however infinitesimally, with urine.

Public health officials say, however, that urine is sterile in healthy people and that the urine in the reservoir was so diluted — perhaps a half pint in millions of gallons — that it posed little risk.

Some people in the city, in the suburbs and around the world called the flush an overreaction, especially since animals such as ducks contribute waste routinely and, sometimes, die in the water.

"More than 1 billion people worldwide do not have reliable access to clean drinking water, and here we are tossing away nearly 8 million gallons of water just to appease the ignorant residents who believe their tap water will otherwise turn yellow," read one comment posted on The Oregonian's Website. 


Let me get this straight...we are rationing water and Portland is flushing 8 million gallons of water. I mean even if the guy that took a leak in the water supply was the guy that drank 48 is 8 million gallons of water and a few ounces of urine. As the writer says, what about the birds and other animals that add their special flavor each day? So, if you knew that a guy took a leak in your water supply, would you drink the tap water?


The reservoirs distribute water that flows from glaciers on Mount Hood. It is treated before it goes to the reservoirs for distribution, and then goes directly to consumers.

The reservoirs are drained twice a year for cleaning, and workers have found animal carcasses, paint cans, construction material, fireworks debris and even the plastic bags people use to scoop up after their dogs, said David Shaff, administrator of the city water bureau.

Even so, Shaff said, the yuck factor was the primary reason for the decision to drain the 8 million gallons, at a cost of less than $8,000 to treat it as sewage.

"Nobody wants to drink pee, and I don't want to deal with the 100 people who would be unhappy that I'm serving them pee in their water," he said. Shaff said the security cameras also showed something that's still unidentified was thrown in the water, heightening concern about potential risks. 

The Mount Hood watershed that supplies the city is brimming this spring, with 8 million gallons flowing through it about every half hour.

"If I lived in Texas, I might have had a different response," he said.  

No Doubt...





While we are on urine, do you remember remember the small quirk that made Moises Alou unique? Moises did not wear batting gloves as he believed that peeing on his hands toughened them to the point that he did not need batting gloves. Jorge Posada apparently also does this during spring training...I think I will opt for a wave if I ever run into these guys









You have probably heard about DeShawn Stevenson being arrested for public intoxication. Were you surprised to hear that it was 10:30 at night and that he was outside a friends apartment in Irving looking for his cell phone? As I read about this event, I was shocked to read that DeShawn did not go to the South Beach team party after they won the championship. His wife is very pregnant and could not make the trip to Miami. So, since she could not come...he did not go to the party. This does not sound like a guy that would be charged a few nights later with public intoxication. So, what did he do wrong? According to Stevenson, he was lucid and told the officers that he was not drunk and was not driving...they arrested him anyway. Officer said he did not know where he was and that he failed a sobriety test.  He spent 5 hours in jail and was charged with a class c misdemeanor. He also paid a fine of $475.00

What did Stevenson do that any of us have not done? DeShawn has an idea of why he was arrested..." Stevenson, a large man who sports several tattoos, including on his face and neck, speculated that officers profiled him based on his appearance. A lot of people get stereotyped. If you see a person like me walking down the street-not in my suit attire-in my average attire, it kind of looks suspect." he said.

The apartment complex was a very nice complex located in Irving. If you see a large man with tatoos on his face and neck wandering around the parking lot, perhaps it would turn heads...but you would think that after the cops talked to him that they would have let him go back to his friends unit....that's just my take anyway.








Can you imagine your son playing in the college world series? Do you think that you would do anything necessary to go to the game? Last year, David Roth missed his son's appearance in Omaha. When South Carolina made it back to Omaha this year, he decided that he would not miss the tournament again. Because he had no personal time available, David had to quit his sales job in Greenville, SC to attend. His son, Michael did not disappoint. He pitched 7 1/3 innings in a victory over Texas A&M on Sunday. Now that is what I call a special father's day gift! By the way, if you know anyone that needs a car salesman in Greenville, David will be available next week!









Hats off to the Marlins for bringing back Trader Jack McKeon. The Marlins went back to a proven formula when they were suddenly without a manager. The man is 80 years old and managing a major league team! So far, so the Marlins won on Tuesday, to end a long dry spell. McKeon is definitely old school and I think that this is exactly what this Marlin team needs. In case you wondered how long the transformation would take, here is your answer:


MIAMI -- Whatever the reason for Hanley Ramirez's day off Monday, his outspoken Marlins teammate Logan Morrison reportedly was none too pleased with Ramirez's perception of time.

A source told the South Florida Sun-Sentinel on Tuesday that Morrison ripped into Ramirez after the shortstop arrived less than half an hour before the team stretch Monday -- something the paper reported Ramirez has had a habit of doing this season. 

Morrison scolded Ramirez for his repeated tardiness, the Sun-Sentinel said, and told him that was the reason for his season-long slump.

According to the paper, Ramirez didn't respond to Morrison's comments until after the outfielder left the room. Then, the paper said, Ramirez began shouting with no particular target identified.

New Marlins manager Jack McKeon held Ramirez out of Monday's lineup, saying that he didn't like the way he ran in the Marlins' previous game.

Morrison would not address the issue when asked about it by the Sun-Sentinel on Tuesday, but Monday, Morrison was hopeful that the arrival of the old-school McKeon would change the attitudes former manager Edwin Rodriguez had tried adjusting.

"We have a lot of guys who Edwin said don't hustle or play hard," Morrison told The Associated Press on Monday. "Maybe Jack can kick them in the butt." 


Good for Morrison... but what is it with Hanley Ramirez? This guy is blessed with unbelievable skills, yet he just does not know how to play the game the right way. Hopefully, McKeon can remind Ramirez what being a professional is all about.




As I have been writing my blog, we actually had a thunderstorm roll in. Maybe it is from Portland? Who cares, we will take it.

That is all I have for today, but I will leave you with a bit of Jack Handey to ponder:


Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess that's like a regular window.  

Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake. That's called Houdini. Love is liking someone a lot.  


Thanks for stopping by and feel free to leave a few deep thoughts of your own...

Tee-Ball Season Begins
Category: User Showcase
Tags: Tee Ball Little Beeze The Beeze Coaching

  Today we squeezed in our first official Tee-Ball game of the season...This is my second season of coaching the Little Beeze's team...This year our name is the Riverdogs...And we have a bad-ass team...Unlike last year, every kid can kind of the throw...The Little Beeze has a great arm, and there is a 2 little girls, and 5 other boys who can throw well...There are only a couple kids that we've had to work with at all, and they have gotten right away...

Most of the kids are hitting well too...Just a couple having trouble, but they'll get there...So, as I said, we squeezed in the first official game today...Between morning thunderstorms, and now the evening storms...It was also picture day...Can't wait to post the boy's evil grin with his bat in hand...

Now this is one of those Pussification of American youth leagues...No keeping score...Everyone bats, it doesn't matter if you get 3 outs, the whole team bats, then you switch...At this age, (5-6 year olds) I'm okay with the everyone batting...But not keeping score bothers me...There should be winning and losing...Kids need to know that losing exists...I made sure that the staff knew that I keep score...How? By how many outs are made...

Well, in game one the Riverdogs dominated...Ripping the ball past their front line of defense, and getting some past their secondary infielders...(3 kids play across an arch near the pitchers mound...Then there are 7 infielders behind them)...The boy laced one through the middle...They got one of our base runners out in the first inning...

Then we took the field...The Little Beeze was playing the third-base side on the arch...That inning he threw a runner out at 1st, home, and 3rd...We got three other runners out...6-1 in my book...Onto the second and usually final inning...(time limit league)...We hit the hell out of the ball some more, and they got one runner out...Little Beeze got his second hit, ripping it down the 3rd base line...

Their last at bat I, being the quality coach that I am, rotated the positions, so everyone gets a chance at some ground ball action...It was humid, and this is the point when the kids lose a bit of focus...We only got one base runner out...Final, 7-2 Riverdogs...Handshakes, and then coach Beeze broke out the "Capri Suns"...

Thursday evening we'll be back at it, and I expect more of the same...It's gonna be a good season!

Later, The Beeze.


Summer Solstice Snooze-Fest Tags: NCAA NFL MLB NBA WNBA NASCAR YATV.

Well well well... It's the first day of 'Summer' here at TheGab.

This bring on a few yearly 'milestones' to look forward to.

For example... No more school buses out and about screwing up your commute to and from work. Maximum construction on every square inch of roadway. Fat guys in Speedo's... SHUDDER... Old dudes in black socks and sandals...

And backyard barbeque's...


Hey look... Wimbeldon... Who cares...

CWS... PINNNG... Switch to wood already before someone else gets killed.

OhioSt... Like I said last time... There will always be evidence.

NFL lockout... Stop fucking around and just sign the papers.

NBA draft is this week... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Did I just watch SpOrTsCeNtEr and NOT see a single story about LeDouche??? You have got to be kidding me. Scratch that. Pat Riely had to open his mouth.

Hey Cubs... Thanks for rolling over against the Yanks this weekend in 'Inter-League' play. You win the Friday night game and then decide that letting them hit BP off your bullpen the next two game would be fun... The Sunday night game was the MOST baseball I have watched in one sitting this year. Looks like it will be the high point for the season. Thanks for ruining it again, Cubs.

Oh, fuck... That's right... Soccer is in it's pre-round-warm-up-round-robin-play-for-2-years-to-not-qualify-for-World-Cup-play

Fuck off soccer...

...And the WNBA
...And the BCS

Ah, crap... Looks like I have run out of sports to offend...

Wait for it... Wait for it... Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaait for it...

Hey NASCAR... Mix in a right turn will ya! It's starting to get old again. No wonder your ratings are down and no one is in the seats at the track. However, when you DO go to a road-coarse, it is a snooze-fest. Who ever qualifies first or second is most likely going to win.

That's it for me... I got shit to do.

Enjoy your summer Gab!!!



Tuesday's Tantrums - 6/21/11
Category: FEATURED


Welcome to the Gab, where thankfully, mercifully, we can begin to move away from that PR challenged moron down in South Florida.  To be honest, I'm trying to find new things to talk about and only gloss over that stuff that's always talked about.

Before I start, I was very remiss by not passing along my most sincere well wishes to all for Father’s Day.  I hope it was as special for you all as it was for me!

Too much crap and too little time.  On to the tantrums…

Rant of the Week - the Vancouver Canucks.  OH HELL NO!  You boys worked together for over nine months only to QUIT at the end???  Not just on yourselves, but on your city and country.  Didn't you hear those fans in the stands take over “Oh Canada” from the singer just before game seven?  Didn't you notice that you had an entire country behind you?  This wasn't just a game to Vancouver fan - it was 40 years of non-championship hockey just waiting to bust out and cheer their heroes, and you let them down.  You players should have been sky-high and laying the wood rather than making BS promises.  Rather than man up, you cowered in a corner after the bully punched you in the mouth and Tim Thomas stood on his head.  You let the Boston Bruins come into IN YOUR OWN FREAKING HOUSE, bitch slap you into the fetal position, and take the Stanley Cup!  Utterly unacceptable!  I'd have expected that type of crap/behavior out of Montreal, but never in a million years would I have guessed that Vancouver would go with the surrender card!


Lord, I wish I was in charge of MTV.  I'd stop making my money by finding new and creative ways to embarass and humiliate the youth of America.  I’d bring back music, you know, melodies with words that you understand?  I'd stop celebrating Teen mothers, drama queens, cribs, and reality freaks.  I'd fire every damn dumb ass suit in the building, and hire musical legends combined with just plain fans who love MUSIC and let them run the network.  I GUARAN-DAMN-TEE you that we could get 24/7 of nothing but music and enjoyment, and it would be split evenly amongst every genre.  A few things I'd do:

(1) I'd bring back the old music shows:  Bandstand, Soul Train, Don Kirshner's Midnight Special, and Austin City Limits. 

(2) I'd bring in the talent shows like Showtime at the Apollo and perhaps even play the old American Idol shows in syndication.

(3) I'd have live shows/performances from established acts once a week.  An example - Sammy Hagar performing at Lake Tahoe, or War from LA?

(4) I'd develop a new show where I hired somebody to drive around the country and find amateur acts like the guy playing the Blues in the Mississippi Delta or one of the bars on Beale Street in Memphis, some Philadelphia Soul, some Seattle Grunge, and Miami latin beat.  What about some Detroit and Southern Rock, South Texas Tejano, or even Tennessee Country?  How 'bout some Jersey Big Band sound, Kentucky Bluegrass, San Francisco Punk or California Lowrider Music?  There's so much that could be done.  Heck, what about some gospel music during a three hour Sunday morning block, followed by a few hours of cool jazz?  Good Lord, could you imagine the popularity of a channel like that?

(5) I'd try to find a way to have original Sunday morning programming that featured gospel music, followed by a few hours of cool jazz, then after twelve noon, who knows - a little head-banger stuff, perhaps?

(6) Last, but most importantly - NO TOP 40!!!  I'll let everybody else handle the Bieber/Cyrus/Spears type crap!

And if my version of MTV got big enough, I would hang a foot so far up the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's stupid ass, it wouldn't even be funny.  I'd make a mockery of them until they pulled their head out and started putting the right people in the Hall.  STOP SCREWING WITH RUSH!!!

By the way, while I'm on the subject, what exactly is wrong with Redneck Chicks?  If this chick is gonna be there, I’m totally “here for the party”…

NHL.  Congrats to Boston.  Hey Beeze, this is yet another example of karma working.  Vancouver jerked with it by biting, flopping and diving, chicken shit hits, and talking smack they couldn’t back up.  Boston just sat back and collected the spoils.  Let that be a lesson – KARMA IS REAL, and she’s a BITCH!

Riots ain't funny, but the picture above was!  Stupid asses getting violent, yet this dude was getting some in the middle of the street while everybody is just going bat-shit crazy around them.  It’s said that the dude in question was an Aussie – that has to be true because there ain’t no shame to an Aussie’s game…

MLB.   Hey John Wall, stick with Basketball cause you sure wouldn't make it in Baseball.

What was the best interleague matchup of the weekend?  I would have said Milwaukee/Boston, but I'm tired of celebrating Irishtown, so I'll go with Pittsburgh and Cleveland. Two cities that hate each other (and are pleasant surprises this season) having a summertime battle that nobody could give two shits about? Cleveland got its share of the rivalry by two 5-1 wins on Friday and Saturday and capped the sweep with a 5-2 win.  I'm surprised that nobody's talking about it, or that the Indian fans didn't set the Cuyahoga river on fire (AGAIN)!!!

A few years ago, Yankees vs. Cubs at Wrigley would have generated a whole hell of a lot more noise than it did. 

Two things that I would have never guessed that you could put together:  Livan Hernandez & money laundering for drug traffickers?  Holy Shit, dude is under investigation?  Wow!

Golf – U. S. Open.   

Rory Mcilroy boat raced the field to win the U. S. Open.  So now the talking heads (as well as his fellow competitors) have decided to crown him King Rory I of Golf World.  Hey talking heads - PLEASE SHUT UP and let the kid enjoy his hard earned  win before you make this kid out to be the best of all time!  Stop putting yet another 22 year old in the tough position of carrying the sport by himself - this generation of Golf has more than Rory.  Jason Day, Graeme McDowell, Yang, Westwood and others are going to be heard from in the coming years!  Oh yeah, this all ought to piss off Eldrick...

By the way, I felt that the course at Congressional was a tore up mess.  If you're gonna host the United States Open, don't you think the grounds would be in better shape?

Aussie Rules Football – Round 13 of 24.   I’m sitting here at the halfway point of the season, and let me tell you that to have one team undefeated half-way through in this rough game is something special.  Geelong appears to be a badass, and easily went through St. Kilda, who was in the Grand Final last year Saturday… 

NFL .   I started this week being told that the NFL is inching closer to an agreement, but then I hear that there's two owners from the AFC who are holding things up or at least being thorns in the side.  Let's find out who they are and why they're doing what they do.

NBA.   If you were to take bets on which one Dallas Maverick was gonna get up close and personal with our friend Johnny Law, who would it be?   DeShawn Stevenson - Drunk and Disorderly staggering through an apartment complex – what a shock!

Hey Tragic “Magic” Johnson,  we all know Peter Vescey is a stupid puke with an axe to grind, we don’t need you bringing his name back into the NBA.  The NBA improved (not by much) when Vescey left.  Hey Magic, why don't we improve the league more by having you stop being an “analyst”.  Go to NBA hell.  Better yet, go to one of your Starbucks and make Nurse Fan (my daughter's) latte BITCH!

Speaking of those jerk-off Fakers, there's a rumor out there that they're trying to send Gasol to Minny for Kevin Love and the #2 pick in Thursday's draft?  Minny, if you do this trade, you are effing stupid and handing the Lakers the west AGAIN!  Talk about a conspiracy theory, how is it these teams are all so eager to help the Lakers get better all the time?   

Canadian Football League.  One more week of pre-season, and then we get to Canada Day and some real football.


Douche Bag of the Week.  I had to bring this back and the winner of this weeks supply of Massengale is a tie: 

(1) The “It’s in the Hole” screamer on every shot during a Golf event.  It's not cool and if I could have reached into my TV set to grab you by the neck and squeeze until your face turned as blue as your hair, I would have done it.  Stop pissing off all the golf snobs around you - you sound as ignorant as you look.  Come up with something fresh - you know like something from Happy Gilmore???

As for #2...

There’s this dude in who celebrated his 58th birthday by pounding back 48 brew-skis (ALLEGEDLY), staggering to the beach, whipping out his schlong, pissing a river into the sand at the Beach, all while scaring granny and kids and forcing Johnny Law to get involved in finding the dude “different accommodations” otherwise known as the Graybar Motel.  Bottom line - this dude wasn't smooth, and Keith Stone is looking to pull his man card!

Look, we all know that when we’re drinking we exaggerate how much we slam back, but there ain’t no way dude put down two cases of Keystone Light, Schlitz, Lucky Lager, Rolling Rock, or whatever he was pounding - hell, he'd be dead. 



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