Truth hurts don't it Buck fan???

Greetings from the Hoodwood, where we would gladly give the people in the Southwest the rain that we've been getting all too much of lately.

Ive seen some beatdowns in my day, but that Mavs beatdown of the Lake Show on Sunday was nothing short of tragic. Not tragic as in my squad lost tragic, but tragic in the sense that you saw the Lakers more or less quit mid way through the second quarter when Peja Stojakovic and Jason Terry started nailing threes like they were going out of style. Im glad that there was some sort of excuse for Pau Gasol’s horrid playoff performance. I would hate to think that he has regressed that bad back into the soft Spaniard that I have long accused him of being.  Lamar Odom??? Pardon my vulgar terminology here, but he needs to stop eating that Kardashian pussy if its gonna make him play like one. That shove on Nowitzki was all kinds of bush league and why doesn’t it surprise me that Andrew Bynum would throw an equally bush league forearm to an airborne JJ Barea. The Lakers are a proud, classy franchise and the actions of Bynum and Odom have shamed that franchise. Not like I really expected Phil Jax to be a classy loser, he and Kobe both seem like the type that would say “I quit” when they are taking a bad loss. Kobe last had that look when the Celtics were housing the Lakers in game 6 of the 2008 NBA finals. That was unexpected, it was an ill coda to an otherwise well-played series. You didn’t expect the Lakers to come up snake eyes so bad in in an elimination game. But this time around you kinda saw it coming; the Lakers got hit in the mouth and folded. In reality this series was over when the Lakers blew an eight point fourth quarter lead in game 3. I told the Lady Bandit that the Lake Show was done that night. One wasn’t expecting the season finale of Desperate Housewives and the Lake Show to be on the same network, same night when the matchup first came about.

Another Cap Fold-o

The Bruins got the big payback, sweeping an overmatched Philly team out of the East Semis like so much yesterdays news, they will face another team that rolled to a sweep …the Lightning. Hold up The Lightning??? What the fu…?? Really, sooner or later the Capitals will put it all together…No then again, they might not. This was the year where they had the shot. A weakened East without Sid the Kid lurking. No wily 8 seed playing without fear poised to ambush. A solid but unremarkable Bruins team awaiting on the other side of the East Bracket and possibly playing a pressure ridden Canucks team in the Finals. But noooooo, the Caps (Alex Ovechkin excepted) played like soft punks not ready for the grind of the playoffs. They looked vulnerable after they struggled to beat the weak-ass New York Rangers in the first round. The Lightning didn’t give the Caps a chance to even get off the mat as they pounded them four straight. The Bruins now have the East home ice advantage and may just head for their first Cup final since 1990.

Derek Jeter…last go round for the Cap?

Seeing this makes me feel old. I remember when Derek Jeter was a fresh faced youngster. The late Phil Rizzuto called him “A goo lookin’ young ballplaya” when he came up in late 1995 and after winning Rookie of the Year in 1996 has been an iconic Yankee cut in the mold of the Mick, Joe Dimaggio and Reggie Jax. A Yankee in the truest sense of the word. I’ve never been much of a Yankee fan, but I’ve always admired Jeter’s style, grace and solid play. Im only a couple years older than Jeter, so I’ve always identified with him as someone of my age that was playing the game. It annoys me then to hear the media knock and dis Jeter hard as he has struggled to find his stroke. Until a 4 hit, 2 homer game on Sunday he was looking all of being hard on 37. His defense is still flawless and he has made numerous breathtaking throws this season alone. Jeter negotiated hard to get a last big payday and the media has rode him hard for it. I wonder will the Yankees ask Jeter to move away from shortstop to make room for the diva that is A-Rod who has been playing 3^rdsince he came to the Yankees in 2004. If that happens, I expect Jeter to refuse the move and retire. But as long as his defense remains solid he will stay, but if his bat doesn’t come around, he might be eased down in the lineup. Stay tuned

Phat Dap/Head Slap

Phat Dap

The Phat Dap goes to Auburn. Not just the school but the community that has rallied around its in-state brethren and usual bitter rival Alabama’s home locale of Tuscaloosa. The region, as you know was hard hit by tornadoes last week. Auburn was the first in line to offer relief aid and donations, creating a facebook page for donations. Its good to see that even the bitterest of rivals and put it aside to help each other.

Head Slap

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse for the Buckeyes, there are now reports that Columbus Area car dealership may have given Buckeye players sweetheart deals on transportation, which is a serious no-no. I’ll comment more on this next week but seriously, how much deeper can the Bucks dig themselves?

Thats the View From the Hoodwood, Until Next Post Fellow Sports Fans!

When did Glenn Healy become such a fucking douchebag? 

Fuck you Glenn Healy.  Your wheels were squeeling in reverse and Stevie Wonder could have seen your backpeddle.  That is the first thing you are taught in high school english.  Using I or we indicates ownership of a situation.  Then fucking knock it off with the "We've seen enough" shit.  As a result, the NHL has imposed some sanctions on the Green Men.  What exactly?  As it turns out, the Green Men are no longer allowed to do handstands or touch the glass surrounding the penalty box.  So, how did they get around these new rules?  I think they did it cleverly.  Keeping with their cardboard cutout motif, they simply created a cardboard cutout of themselves and had the cardboard cut out doing the handstand and it was the cardboard cutout that was touching the glass.  Personally, I get a kick out of these guys.  I think they are good for the game and the environment in the arena.  Plus, it takes big balls to go to Nashville in the Green Men suits and take in a game.

This is what they did after the new rules were imposed on them.

I love the fact that they even got Mike Fisher with the cardboard cut out of Underhill.  Much like last year when they had a cardboard cutout of Vince Vaughn in a Canucks jersey while they were playing the Blackhawks.  Comedic genius I say.  We need more of them.  It's not like they are the belligerent fans that are drinking too much and throwing shit on the ice.

By the way...what sound does it make when the shower water hits Glenn Healy during his monthly shower?   DOUCCCCHHHHHHHEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

Now, on to the playoffs!

Being a Boston fan, I am ecstatic that the Bruins are in the Conference finals for the first time since 92.  However, they have been dealt quite a serious blow with the injury to Bergeron.  Bergeron has by far been the best player on the ice for the Bruins this postseason.  Bergeron is leading the team in scoring, hits, shots, and is a spectacular 64.2% in the faceoff circle this postseason.  A prolonged absence by Bergeron will hurt the Bruins chances in the next round against Tampa.  Tampa has been playing solid defensive hockey so far in the post season.  Tampa has done a good job of employing the 1-3-1 system so far.  This series is going to be very low scoring, since Tampa and Montreal play very similar styles.  However, Tampa is much deeper offensively than Montreal, and Roloson has been playing like an elderly man possessed.  This is going to be a great series.

Nashville went into Vancouver last night and forced a game 6.  Last night was one of the few chances I have had to watch Nashville play this post season, and let me tell you how impressed I was with them.  They are getting contributions from all skaters on the ice, and I liked how they were facing elimination and went into Vancouver and forced a game 6.  Good job on Nashville.

In the other series happening right now, I liked San Jose's chances against the Wings.  It will be hard for the Wings to come back after being down 3-0, but as a Boston fan I am fully aware of how possible it actually is.  Game 5 rolls tonight in San Jose, and it is literally do or die for the Red Wings.  Given the veteran leadership that is on the Detroit team, you know that they are going to come out flying tonight.  Detroit has to get lots of shots on Niemi tonight, but more importantly, they have to make sure they have Niemi moving around in the nets and that they don't give him a chance to get set for the shot.  Watch for lots of one timers tonight.  It is going to be a great game.

And now, more side boob.

Thanks for stopping by.  Have a great week!

Hotchnuts

Willie Mays turned 80 today, which is most probably not an event of major significance to most of my readers, but to all the baby boomers like me, it is certainly a monumental event.  It is not merely the fact of Willie’s advancing age, but the fact that our own ages are also advancing that is so shocking.  I grew up loving baseball and having the opportunity to watch Willie, Mickey Mantle, and Duke Snider all play centerfield at the same time.  Only Willie survives of this glorious threesome, Mickey left us nearly 16 years ago and the Duke departed about 2 months ago.   It was a golden era of baseball and, with the more recent popularity of other sports such as football, basketball, and hockey, perhaps it is a golden era of baseball that is lost forever in the past.  It was an era that I feel fortunate to have witnessed.

It certainly appears that we are witnessing a changing of the guard in the NBA this playoff season, and this is very refreshing to me.  San Antonio, the #1 seed in the Western Conference, has already bit the dust at the hands of the upstart Memphis Grizzlies, and the defending Champion Los Angeles Lakers are currently trailing the Dallas Mavericks 0-3 in the second round.  The Boston Celtics are down 0-2 to the Miami Heat and they appear to be in dire straits without a big man in the middle.  I personally would love to see the Chicago Bulls winning the Eastern Conference and either Memphis or Oklahoma City advancing in the Western Conference. “New blood, you gotta love it” would make a great NBA advertising.  Speaking of Dire Straits:

The Kentucky Derby is this afternoon, and it is amazing to realize that it has been 33 years since the last Triple Crown winner, Affirmed in 1978.  Even more unbelievable is that is has been 44 years since baseball had a Triple Crown winner, Carl Yastrzemski for the Boston Red Sox in 1967.  Baseball’s National League has not had a Triple Crown Winner for 74 seasons, Joe Medwick for the Saint Louis Cardinals in 1937.  Here’s hoping that both Horse Racing and Baseball end these streaks soon.  Both sports could use the notoriety. 

It is nearing the time that the 2011 NFL season is going to be put in permanent jeopardy.  Last week’s NFL Player Draft was just a temporary appeasement and it appears that absolutely NOTHING is being done to settle the lock-out.   I, for one, am completely fed up with the whole sordid affair.  It is time for us fans to boycott the NFL and to turn our attention to the upcoming NCAA Football season.

Welcome to The Fry Day Blog

Today dvt fries the number one,

for insisting on the number two...

ESPN's Mike and Mike burned my bagel this week...

The topic???

Cam Newton...

The Carolina Panthers #1 draft pick...

And his desire to wear the #2 jersey...

The only problem???

It's belongs to Jimmy Clausen...

Newton's rival for the starting quarterback position...

Clausen and Newton...

Newton and Clausen...

Makes me hungry for cookies and pickles...

I don't THINK I'm pregnant...

Anyways...

The Mikes were discussing...

Whether or not Clausen should give up his #2 jersey to Cam...

Hmmm...

Something is seriously out of kilter here...

Wait a second guys...

Cam's the new kid in town...

Not Jimmy...

Why does the onus have to be on Clausen???

Way to go, Cam...

Way to alienate your teammate right off the bat...

If you had any class...

If you had any respect for your teammate...

If you had any humility...

You would take another number...

After all...

It's just a number...

Nobody wore #4 last year...

Two squared...

Twice as good as #2...

And while you're at it, Cam...

You can carry his shoulder pads...

C'mon, Cam...

Jimmy feels bad enough as it is...

He was only drafted last year...

And then they turned around and drafted you...

And then you turned around and demanded his number...

It's called protocol, Cam...

Don't even think of putting him in a position to say no...

Ever heard of seniority???

And of course, Cam...

If the shoe was on the other foot...

We know that you would be so very gracious...

And let the rookie wear your number...

Right, Cam???

But...

If your really, really, really want #2...

We can certainly arrange that for you...

So pretend you're at Baskin-Robbins...

And take a number...

Another number...

But not #2, Cam...

After all...

If you wanna be a leader...

You need to act like "one"...

dvt

PHOTO

 http://www.crunchgear.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/sin-city-death-row-marv-electric-chair-figure.jpg

http://www.mastrio.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/05/big-fig.jpg

http://img4.realsimple.com/images/food-recipes/shopping-storing/0707/pickles-claussen_300.jpg

http://www.realhilarious.com/images/fake_craps/doos_chunky_number_two.jpg

VIDEO

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGO6DJBo9MY