Beeze, and as he enters the place the entire tavern erupts in a "BEEZE" cheer, has taken on a new cause celebre - that of a young Brazilian student expelled from university for wearing a far too short mini-dress.  With his time and attention, she was finally readmitted to the school AND will refuse to change the way she dresses.  God bless the Beezer and God bless the Brazilians.  

 

Sully has just strolled in, as mad as a chimp on Xanax about the balloon boy's parents copping a guilty plea in their media hoax.  It seems his upset stems from the fact that he was working Richard Heeney over to get the YouGab logo emblazoned on the balloon, but that the Heeney wanted something a little more than the "YouGab" Bucks Sully had left over from the "Buy the Pirates" campaign.  Then to make matters worse, he found out that Don Fehr - one of the men largely credited with creating the monstrosity that is the MLBPA - has been appointed by the NHLPA to head up the search for a new executive director for the hockey players.  He mumbled something under his breath about the fact that no one could've screwed the pooch as hard or as often as the NHLPA to the point that choosing Donald Fehr to head the selection committee looks like a genius move.  To counter the Fehr appointment by the NHLPA, Gary Bettman has apparently reinstated Henry Samueli to the NHL from his suspension as owner of the Mighty Ducks.  Samueli pled guilty to lying to the Securities Exchange Commission on business related to the company he founded and unrelated to the Ducks, but Bettman (his surname is a bit of an odd sort of irony, isn't it) decided that since he hadn't helped the NHL share in any kind of insider trading  suspended Samueli back in June 2008.  Now with Fehr plotting the future of the players association, I guess he figures that the league may need some cash infusion or something.  Get this:  Samueli bought the team for $75MM and as of last year, the Ducks were valued at $202 Million.  Samueli has something figured out and it seems to Sully and me that the NHL could use some of that.

 

Now, two months after IHateMillen, in the role of "Woody," got the Tavern's employee of the month, he's out on his ear looking for work, in startling juxtaposition to Charlotte Hornets' former head coach, Byron Scott.  Two years ago he was Coach of the Year.  On Thursday, he's 3-6 and done.  Yet at 1-7, Eric Mangini is still head coach of the Clowns despite certain unnamed veteran running backs complaining that he's working the team too hard and despite the as yet unexplained ouster of George Kokinis from his Clowns GM position  (Speaking of which, I love the equally awful Lions home page this week - advertising the upcoming November 22 match up with the Clowns, "TICKETS NOW AVAILABLE!" You don't say!)  

 

Madder than hell the Steelers beat the Broncos, it seems our man Broncs went on a tear, terrorizing a helpless Doty Pittsburgh-kid and his family.  Well, in no time flat, Broncs and Doty were slapping citizens arrests on each other and calling the incident "traumatizing."  All this over having to pay off on a misbegotten bet.  

 

Well, that's all the news that fits for this week.   You want to be somewhere you can see the troubles are all the same...where everybody Mo's your name...