Hey Gab… Bet you’ve been wondering where I have been… Let’s just say in a funk. To put it in a Manti Te’O phrasing… It’s me, not you.  My desire to do what I have done just isn’t there. Do I need to apologize to some for just ‘dropping off the face of the earth’? Sure. Do I need to thank you guys for picking up where I dropped the ball? ABSOLUTELY!!! So, thanks Sully, Beeze, Brad, Kyle, Gerry and the rest of the Gab for doing what you love.

…Now on to what’s important… Football

I’ve been keeping in touch on the FB page with you guys going back and forth during the playoffs and who is in the Super Bowl and who isn’t. Go ahead, say what you will. Say what you have been regarding Ray Lewis. That’s your opinion and you are welcome to it. All I will say is he ‘worked’ the system and it is what it is. How many other affluent athletes have gone down the wrong path only to be bailed out by high price lawyers and persuadable justice systems? Should he be banned from the game? Some call for his head on a lance in the front entry of Roger Goodell’s office. Did he kill someone on the field? No.

Have other players killed people and returned to the game? Yes.  Have other players killed and never returned to the game? Yes.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_professional_sportspeople_convicted_of_crimes

Just don’t sit and preach to me on and on ad nauseum over Ray Lewis when I just want to talk playoff football and the team I cheer for, the Baltimore Ravens. Bring something else to the table other than ‘oh, look. Ray’s crying on camera again’ or ‘oh geez, Ray found Jesus’… C’mon, have a take. Don’t think that Flacco is Elite? I will agree he doesn’t have the ‘Rings’ that Brady, the Manning boys, or Worthlessburger might have. But he sure as hell is putting on a fucking show between the lines.

We can all agree that the Colts didn’t have a snowballs chance in Tampa to get over on the Ravens. The first half of the game may have questioned that logic. But once the Ravens got their groove on, it was nothing but a ‘boat-race’ the second half. Constantly pressuring Luck. Converting on offense. Making plays and scoring touchdowns. Were Flacco’s numbers ‘Elite’ during that game? One could argue not: 12/23 282yds 2td’s 0Int’s. A.Luck was 28/54 288 0td 1int. But they got the fucking job done and put the ball in the endzone to beat the Colts. Not to mention holding the #1 pick in the draft without a touchdown in his first Playoff appearance.

…And then the chatter started immediately as to how the Raven’s weren’t going to get out of Denver. Peyton this. Peyton that. Peyton’s gonna throw the ball all over Colorado on the Ravens defense and they are going to fly back to B’more crying in Rays lap because it’s all over. Hey Champ Bailey, go sit with Cory Webster and talk how you’re the greatest defensive player on the field. Take away the two kick returns for scores… The Donkeys aren’t even in the show. How did Mr.Insignificant do during that game? 18/34 331yd 3td’s 0int’s. 2 HUGE bombs for scores. Torry Smith making the secondary look like a J.V.HighSchool squad. Not too shabby. How about the ‘head-donkey’ himself and his 2-glove approach? 28/43 290y. 3td 2 int’s. What does it say that the coaches of Denver don’t have the confidence in THEIR ELITE QB to try and drive the field with 37 seconds and 2 timeouts??? The poor wife got a taste of what’s to come for the AFC Championship game and how freaked out I get while watching games… The bomb to tie the game at the end of regulation had me running all around the house screaming like a teeny-bopper at a KatyPerry concert. Unfuckingbelievable… I could watch the replay of that pass till kick off next season.

Now on to this past Sunday’s game… Seems the board over on FB got real fucking quiet, real fucking quick early on in the second half… But we will get to that soon enough. I had a knot in my stomach for 3 days leading up to the Denver game… I had the same one starting this past Wednesday.

Were Flacco’s numbers pretty this game? Depends on what your definition of pretty is… 21/36 240y 3td 0.int. Tom Terrific was chucking the ball all over Foxboro that night. 29/54 320 1td 2.int. Welker got his numbers. There was no getting around that. Ridley got KNOCKED DA’ FUQ OUT!!! But only AFTER Dennis Pita got blasted coming down from making a catch. Was there a call for ‘defenseless receiver’?? Nope. Are running backs categorized differently in regards to helmet-to-helmet contact? Yes. The team one roots for in that game determines whether or not he was down, was that hit considered illegal, was that a fumble, and so on. So, putting that one play aside, this game was Jeckel and Hyde going from the first half to the second.

Brady and the Pats offence were unstoppable. They put the ball where they wanted, gaining 8 yards repeatedly on 1^st down to make converting on the next play a no brainer. The hurry up offense was keeping the Ravens Def on their heels the entire time. What the fuck happened in the locker-room during halftime to make them switch up what they were doing? The defense wasn’t getting very much pressure on Brady, so to abandon the hurry-up baffles me. What was the ‘Hoody’ thinking? Or did fucking up the end of the half by not taking the time out and getting at least one shot at the endzone screw up their Mojo and put them in such a tail spin they couldn’t recover? It was like the two teams completely switched. When Bolden caught the second TD to put Baltimore up by 2 scores and the defense stopped the tank that is TomBrady and the NEPats offense. It was on!!!

Guess what everybody? Now you get to listen to ME for 2 weeks squawking on how my team is going to win. How my team rolled through the #1 seed, the #2 seed. Sat down the 2 starting QB’s selected for this years Pro-Bowl. Went in to 2 hostile stadiums and walked out victors.

IT’S MY FUCKING HORN… I’M GONNA FUCKING TOOT IT!!! So… fuck you, fuck you… fuck you, you and you… fuck all the people who said the Ravens couldn’t do it.

The talking heads couldn’t get in Brady’s pants quick enough after the Ravens beat the Broncos and then had to travel to NewEngland. Brady this, Beleck that, NewEngland is gonna do this, the Ravens can’t do that. I had to listen to it for two weeks last year. So sit down and shut up… I’m gonna be here a while.

In the words of my HighSchool Track coach… “Go lay down”

Holy shit… All that and I didn’t even get to the SuperBowl. Well fuck me.

Keapernik scares me. We beat Luck because he was a rookie and hadn’t seen a defense like that. Peyton didn’t throw the ball over 20 yards in any attempt in his game. But K has some speed that will definitely show the age of our D. This game is going to be a ‘first to 40’ and a ‘whoever has the ball last wins’ feel to it for me. Both teams can chuck it down field and can stifle an opponent’s drive in a heartbeat. Once we get closer and I watch some more of the talking heads, I’ll come back with some final thoughts on the game. First blush: Ravens win (DUH) 35-28.

 My house won’t be the same. Friends coming over for the game are 49er’s fans. This won’t be pretty. We have agreed on a friendly wager already. Also decided that he and I might hold off on consuming alcohol till well into the2nd half so that we may enjoy the game. As opposed to last year’s abortion when we went in to the kitchen at the half to avoid whatever mess that was, got hammered and didn’t update the squares board for the 3^rd quarter. 49er fan killed a bottle of 3-OlivesGrape with Redbull. He says he doesn’t remember leaving the house. Good thing he had a ride. I was putting down the beers like a good Polish/German boy should.

Well boys… it’s now 4:15am, it’s NEGATIVE FUCKING 6 out and I’m going to bed. I look forward to your comments. And once again. It wasn’t you… It was me.

S.

Hello and welcome to another Wednesday of deep thoughts. I hope this day finds each of you warm and healthy. In my part of the country, we are having what we consider a cold spell. Dark, cold and damp is the kind of day yesterday was…the kind of weather that brings spring to mind. But, thoughts of spring will have to wait…we have time left in January and it always blows cold.

Last weekend was a feast for football fans. Many will look at the overtime loss of the Broncos or the Falcon comeback over the Seahawks as the most significant playoff games. The Peyton haters will point to his late interception as the reason for Denver’s loss. There really is no explanation for making that pass…QBs at every level are told not to make that pass. Rolling right, you never throw back to the middle. The angles favor the defense and bad things frequently happen. What many will miss is the game called by Fox and the poor defense Denver displayed. Hey, give Flacco credit too, he made the pass, but it was a pass of desperation. There was no last minute drive. No precision. No great play calls. It was a prayer that somehow Denver allowed to be answered. Exciting? Absolutely, but the Ravens should temper their excitement…the Patriots are next and the hoodie is smarter than a fox.

Playoff games are difficult to predict. As fans, we never really know if young players will be able to deal with the big games. Last week featured two young QBs in Russell Wilson and Colin Kapernick. It would be a fair statement to say that if not for injury, Wilson could easily have been replaced by the Redskin’s Griffin. Nevertheless, it was Wilson in Atlanta leading a comeback over the top seeded Falcons. Sadly for Seahawk fans, the touted Seattle defense allowed Matty Ice to live up to his nickname and drive his team into position to kick the winning field goal. Now…that was a drive to be remembered…a deep out and then a pass to Tony Gonzalez set up the game winning kick. But, watching this game play out, I was struck by several crucial mistakes that easily could have cost Atlanta the game. I had no problem with Atlanta kicking that field goal when they did, but why not let the clock run down before calling a time out? And…why in heavens name do you kick an onside kick when Seattle only needed a field goal to win the game. Yes, there were only seconds left on the clock, but winning coaches don’t leave anything to chance. As it was…Seattle had the chance to kick a 66 yard field goal that Carroll elected not to try. Smith or Carroll may one day win a Super Bowl, but they will first have to learn how to embrace the big moments.

There were two other games last weekend, but really only one that bears discussion for me. To steal a line…the Texans were who we thought they were…and they were found wanting. I will only say regarding Houston that it seems very obvious to me that it is time for a new head coach in town. The Texan’s conservative approach just will not beat a team like New England. The Texans need someone like Jim Harbaugh…this is the story that really strikes me. Harbaugh is a character, no doubt…but he is not afraid. In week 8, Alex Smith led the 49ers over the Cardinals 24 to 3…his stats for the game? 19 attempted passes and 18 completions for 232 yards and 3 TDs. Now…that is one helluva game. After Smith suffered a concussion, Colin Kapernick became the San Francisco QB. Two things strike me…Harbaugh found Kapernick and had the guts to stay with him instead of bringing back Smith. In Kapernick, the 49ers have found a QB that quite frankly is a game changer. Until the game against Green Bay, I was still unsure of Kapernick’s mettle. My doubts regarding Kapernick’s ability to play on the playoff stage were quickly dismissed. Colin Kapernick did not just beat the Green Bay defense, he embarrassed them. There is a change coming to the NFL. For years, professional football has refused to utilize the running QB. Of course, there have been a few…Tarkenton, Staubach, Steve Young and most recently Michael Vick. What is changing now is the way that the NFL QBs are running. I watched DeMarco Ware stand almost helpless as RG3 optioned off him time and again. Colin Kapernick ran untouched for 50 yards…against the Green Bay defense. The zone read is here to stay in the NFL. The NFL defenses have no answer for how to stop this offense. But, of course…they will adjust. Some will say that QBs in the NFL are too valuable to run this offense, but the reality is…it works. Unless something crazy happens, we will see San Francisco play either New England or Baltimore in the Super Bowl. I just have no confidence that Atlanta can stop Kapernick and the 49ers. Go ahead Atlanta…focus on stopping that run. The lasers you will see are the TD passes that Kapernick will be throwing all over the field. The success of Kapernick, Wilson and Griffin are due in part because they also pass extremely well. Yes my friends, this is something different and the NFL is finally beginning to understand. Did you know that Washington coaches spent three weeks in Waco Texas learning how to run Baylor’s offense? Yes, they get it now. Those crazy college offenses have merit. Now, I wonder what would have happened if Tim Tebow or even Vince Young had found a team willing to learn what they did well? I cannot say that Tebow or even Young throw the ball as well as this new group of QBs…just saying that there might be a few teams out there that could do worse…

Did you hear the one about Johnny Football kicking OU's ass then going to an Oklahoma casino and hitting it big? Apparently the Aggie brass are none to happy if you heard about this on Twitter. Seems that they do not feel that a Heisman winner should be sharing his good times on Twitter. Is there anything that this kid can't do?

More troubling to some was the fact that he was wearing a Miami Heat hat...

A few odds and ends…

Did you see that an attorney has filed a law suit against the Spurs for resting their best players? Check this out:

http://espn.go.com/nba/story/_/id/8847216/san-antonio-spurs-sued-lawyer-resting-top-players

What an idiot…

Did you happen to see that a 4 star recruit (Kylie Fitts) has decommited from USC? This kid graduates early with plans of entering USC this spring. Three days before the student is to enter school, he finds out that Kiffin has the scholarship deferred to the fall. Oops…

That’s all I have today, but I will leave you with a bit of Jack Handey:

Contrary to popular belief, the most dangerous animal is not the lion or tiger or even the elephant. The most dangerous animal is a shark riding on an elephant, just trampling and eating everything they see.

If you go through a lot of hammers each month, I don't think it necessarily means you're a hard worker. It may just mean that you have a lot to learn about proper hammer maintenance.

Thanks for stopping by and feel free to leave a few deep thoughts of your own…

  (Props to Beeze for showing me this one!) 

  Hello ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to another Sexy Action Sports Saturday with IHM. This week, with a little over a month to go til the NFL Draft, I thought I’d give the ol’ mock draft a spin, and see what you folks think. So, without further adieu…

1. Colts- QB Andrew Luck, Stanford. No brainer at #1 overall. Griffin III has the physical tools, but Luck has both the tools and smarts to be a great NFL quarterback. Only time will tell which one has the better career.
2. Redskins- QB Robert Griffin III, Baylor. Griffin is the reason the Redskins mortgaged their entire future… and it better pay off. If not, you’re looking at another three years before you have a first round pick to use on your next “quarterback of the future”.
3. Vikings-  OT Matt Kalil, USC. Kalil is the highest rated tackle in the draft, and the Vikings are rebuilding their offensive line. Kalil gives them a potential Pro Bowler for the next decade or so.
4. Browns-  RB Trent Richardson, Alabama. Fourth overall is a heavy price to pay for a running back in today’s NFL, but Richardson is a different breed of back. He’s a workhorse, and can take a lot of pressure off McCoy, or whoever the hell the Browns put under center this year after losing out on the RGIII sweepstakes.
5. Buccaneers- CB Morris Claiborne, LSU. Best corner of a fairly strong class comes off at #5.
6. Rams- WR Justin Blackmon, Oklahoma State. A bit high in my opinion for Blackmon, but Sam Bradford needs a #1 wideout, and Blackmon is the best of a shaky draft class.
7. Jaguars- DE Quinton Coples, North Carolina. The Jags need a bit of everything. Coples improves the pass rush.
8. Dolphins- QB Ryan Tennehill, Texas A&M. I’m not high on Tannehill, but the Dolphins need a QB after losing out on the Peyton Manning sweepstakes. Hell, now that they’ve traded Marshall, they pretty much need a little bit of everything.
9. Panthers- DE Melvin Ingram, South Carolina. BDub gets to root for one of his Gamecocks as a pro, as Ingram helps fill the void left by Julius Peppers signing with Chicago a few years back.
10. Bills- ILB Luke Kuechly, Boston College. The Bills have made defense a priority, and Kuechly hopefully gives them a starter at MLB for years to come.
11. Chiefs- CB Dre Kirkpatrick, Alabama. The Chiefs need secondary help (among many other things), and Kirkpatrick is the second best corner in this draft.
12. Seahawks- G David DeCastro, Stanford. A little high for an interior lineman, but Seattle will build from the inside-out.
13. Cardinals- OT Riley Reiff, Iowa. The Cardinals are happy to have Reiff on the board as they pick, and so is Harvey.
14. Cowboys- CB Janoris Jenkins, North Alabama. The Cowboys need secondary help, and they get a solid corner with return skills in Jenkins.
15. Eagles- DT Dontari Poe, Memphis. This guy has shot up draft boards in recent weeks, and the Eagles get him at #15.
16. Jets- OT Jonathan Martin, Stanford. The Jets get to work building their aging offensive line.
17. Bengals- CB Stephon Gilmore, South Carolina. Corner is a priority.
18. Chargers- DT Michael Brockers, LSU. Good value pick at #18. This guy is a top 5 talent.
19. Bears- WR Stephen Hill, Georgia Tech. The Bears need help at wide receiver, even with the addition of Brandon Marshall. Hill has the size and speed to be a stud.
20. Titans- DE Nick Perry, USC. Perry was once considered a top ten pick. The Titans are happy if he falls this far.
21. Bengals- OLB Courtney Upshaw, Alabama. Best outside backer in the draft adds to the Bengals defensive stockpile.
22. Browns- WR Michael Floyd, Notre Dame. Floyd was a stud in college, and gives the Browns a chance at having a legit #1 receiver for the first time since Braylon Edwards (waiting for the sound of grinding teeth eminating from the Fish House)!
23. Lions- SS Mark Barron, Alabama. The Lions could reach for a corner here, or for a second-rate tackle to groom under Backus, or they could snag a Pro Bowl caliber safety. I go with the Pro Bowl caliber safety here.
24. Steelers- OT Mike Adams, Ohio State. Adams is probably the best prospect left at tackle, and the Steelers have well-documented issues along the offensive line.
25. Broncos- WR Kendall Wright, Baylor. The Broncos have a new toy in Peyton Manning, and they need a weapon for him to throw to. Wright joins a young core of receivers in Eric Decker and Demariyus Thomas in Denver.
26. Texans- DT Fletcher Cox, Mississippi State. Good value late in the first round for this young, up and coming defense.
27. Patriots- DT Jerel Worthy, Michigan State. Watching the guy in college, I can tell you Pats fans he is an absolute beast.
28. Packers- C Peter Kontz, Wisconson. The Pack just signed Jeff Saturday, but Kontz gives them a local boy to groom for the future. Kontz can also fill in at guard if needed.
29. Ravens- LB Dont’a Hightower, Alabama. The guy gets to learn under Ray Lewis… just hope he keeps his tutelage to ON the field behaviors.
30. 49ers- WR Alshon Jeffery, South Carolina. The Niners need receivers, and Jeffery is one of my favorites in this class.
31. Patriots- RB Doug Martin, Boise State. Martin is a versatile back, something the Pats value. He’s a tough runner and catches the ball well out of the backfield. Nice fit for that offense.
32. Giants- DT Devon Still, Penn State. The guy’s stock is falling, but the Giants might just get a steal at the end of the first round here.

  That’s all the mocking I have in me today… as our pal OldHarry says… go ahead and do some mocking of your own.

  So now Peyton Manning is a Bronco… and Tim Tebow is a Jet. Wow… what a dip shit move by the Jets. Giving up a seventh round pick for this guy is too much. Do they have ANY idea how quickly the city of New York will turn on a quarterback who completes 47% of his passes? Let alone with all the pretentious “Jesus” bullshit. But, on the other hand… he’s always got this guy on his side…

  Quote of the week goes to New York Jets DT Kris Jenkins after hearing of the trade. His twitter quote; “I think I threw up in mouth a little bit” when learning his team traded for Tim Tebow. Yeah, Tebow’s going to do just fine in THAT locker room. Don’t be surprised if he leaves New York a tatted up, alcoholic mess. What a dip shit move for the Jets… don’t know how many times I can say that before I’m satisfied.

  As for the Saints and their bounty program… they pretty much got what they deserved. Peyton got suspended a year, ex-Defensive coordinator and alleged “ring leader” Greg Williams got an indefinite suspension, and the team was fined $500,000 and forfeits two second-round picks this year and next. Hope that was worth it, Saints. Hope Greg Williams never works in the NFL again.

  This week, we’ve got two contenders for our shut the fuck award… the first is the new guy in town, trying as hard as he can to endear himself to a tough fan base… that man, of course, is new Red Sox skipper Bobby Valentine. Usually, anybody giving the Yankees shit is something I would celebrate… but Valentine bitching about Giarardi not wanting to play extra innings in a spring training game, just shut the fuck up. Our next contender is Warren Sapp, commentator for the NFL Network for his calling out of the “snitch” who ratted the Saints out in the Bounty “scandal”. Can we stop it with the fucking hood mentality already? This is professional football… the “Snitches get stitches” horse shit is just played out. Bottom line, whomever the “snitch” is deserves a lot of credit. No matter what level you play on, bounties for injuring an opposing player is just an asshole way to play the game of football.

   So what are your thoughts on my mock draft… who do you want to shut the fuck up more? Be sure to let me know in the comments below. Thanks as always for reading and for any comments you leave on the way out. Have a great weekend.

In the last episode...

Of our continuing saga...

A particular quarterback...

Was separated from the love of his life...

And headed toward a new relationship...

And...

A particular head coach...

Was making plans...

To lead his team to the promised land...

In their home city...

On a Super Day...

Next February...

And...

Another particular head coach...

Was promising the world...

To everyone who would listen...

But laid an egg instead...

Yes, ladies and gentlemen...

Welcome to...

Peyton...

Payton...

and Peyton Place...

An NFL Production...

You see...

All the other sports have shut down this week...

No March Madness...

No NBA regular season...

No hockey...

No baseball spring training...

Because...

All have been pre-empted by America’s only sport...

Professional footboll...

A tear falls...

As Peyton Manning and the Colts part ways...

Many suitors come to the table...

Including a team...

That already has a Hall of Fame quarterback...

Tim Tebow...

What???

Shun The Chosen One for a mere mortal???

How can it be???

But, yes...

It did happen, didn’t it???

And just as the ink dries...

The Grand Poobah of the NFL....

Roger the Codger...

Wields his hammer...

And captures his own bounty...

Striking many blows...

Including a one year knockout...

To New Orleans coach...

Sean Payton...

With others left strewn...

All over the place...

Including a dream of playing in the Super Bowl...

This coming year...

On home turf...

NOT!!! 

Leaving one to question...

Who’s gonna be the Interim Head Coach???

Dog???

And also...

Nearly simultaneously...

The Broncos send The Chosen One to the Big Apple...

To The Zoo York Jets...

A soap opera in its own right...

To film the latest version of...

The Odd Couple...

Rex Ryan and Tim Tebow...

Lord knows...

Who-da thunk that???

And so...

The soap opera continues...

Next week...

When...

To the chagrin of many...

An old friend returns...

Passing footballs in his Wrangler jeans...

Upstaging this week’s principals...

While hogging air time...

On the Entertainment and Sports Programming Network...

And proclaiming...

That he may indeed return...

For the umpteenth time...

And just when you think it won’t happen...

It probably will...

Because this is the NFL...

America’s Reality TV Landlord...

In reality...

We are just its tenants...

dvt

http://static.tvguide.com/MediaBin/Content/090209/News/DVD_News/090213dvd-PeytonPlace1.jpg

http://www.dogthebountyhunter.com/Images/Media/AboutDog2.jpg

http://images.zap2it.com/images/tv-EP00003177/the-odd-couple.jpg

  Attention citizens of Denver, Colorado... your savior is no more. That's right... how do you justify getting rid of Jesus Christ? When the Jesus Christ of modern-day quarterbacks wanders into town looking for a five year- $100 million dollar deal, that's how. Peyton Manning has told his agent to "get a deal done" with the Broncos after his many visits with many callers. That's right, Broncos, next year you'll be treated to a starting quarterback that can complete over 47% of his passes... you know, kind of like you had at the START of last season with Kyle Orton. But all is not lost, all you Tebowmaniacs out there... no matter where Timmy ends up, you'll always have this guy there to cheer you up.