I don’t have a crystal ball
Bill Parcells once had one… but lost it
One cool rainy night at old
Foxboro Stadium the story goes… it disappeared,
Just vanished from his desk that was tucked into a corner of the locker room in that $7 million dollar High School like stadium…
Bill doesn’t have one and I don’t have a crystal ball either, someone does I’ve heard…
Just for the next few minutes imagine if someone you knew did.
with that in mind read this totally imaginary scene from the posh establishment you have all visited on Mondays here at the Gab,
Mo’s Tavern http://www.yougabsports.com/pt/Odds--Ends-at-the-Tavern/blog.htm
Some time in mid August of this year some of the resident Gab/Patriots fans
sat around Mo’s infamous round table
Chewing the fat and discussing the upcoming season of unknowns and
unwanted changes with their favorite team
This conversation was overheard with Tom Waits singing about closing time in the background…
Oldharry: I think that Sudfeld kid will make us forget Hernandez.
Sully: Cuz, are you high man? that Sudfeld is a stiff! He’ll probably be on the Jets before the seasons over.
Lanz: He’s a big kid, should be able to get open, may have potential…we’ll see.
Mo: lets see…5 Sam Adams, 1 Glenlivet 21 on rocks, 1 Woodstock Pigs Ear Brown Ale… Want funions, nuts or chex mix?
Oldharry: Yes, thanks Mo, all around. I think Suds works out Sully, he will be solid opposite Fells or Ballard till Gronk gets back.
Sully: Mo, what do you think about this years Pats?
Mo: can’t you see I’m working Kevin, got an establishment to run...
maybe let you in on something later big guy.
Hal: Ballard looks like he’s running in mud, he won’t be on the final 53
Radatz: Fells can’t block or catch, I say he’s gone too.
Tage: The receivers have me worried, bunch of kids with potential but no experience,
Brady will be screaming at these guys, we’ll be feeling bad for them by week two…
Oldharry: I see Ridley having a big year, maybe 1400 yards and a dozen TD’s.
Sully: I’m a little worried about scoring, the D will be solid if they stay healthy, last thing they can afford is Vince, Spikes or Mayo getting tweaked and missing some time.
Radatz: The D backs should be better if Dennard can stay out of jail, Talib can cover most, Arrington has good ball skills and Adrian Wilson is a pro, he reminds me of Rodney Harrison out there.
Tage: The kicking game is solid, Gostkowski is money and who doesn’t love Zoltan Mesko. That guy will be here for the rest of his career and they have that speedster Boyce who should be returning kicks
Lanz: Ridley should be ok if he can hold onto to the ball but I think the key to the offense is Vereen, he’s due for a break out year and Tommy will lean on him with Welker and Woodhead gone. Vereen can line up outside and with that speed he’s a mismatch.
Hal: Amendola should be able to take Welkers slack, it’s the TE’s and outside receivers I’m not to sure of. The most experienced receiver on the team is Edelman and he’s fragile
Oldharry: Welker won’t catch 40 balls in Denver with maybe 2 TD’s, he is Manning’s 4th option. He made a mistake going to Denver. Mark my words, Peyton has no arm strength and the Broncos will be lucky to win 8 games with that D. Atlanta and the Pats are the class of the NFL this year.
Tage: Oldharry that blind loyalty is why NFL fans around the country hate us.
Manning is due for a huge year, Broncos should win 14.
I wonder if Lloyd, Gaffney and Branch will hang around waiting for a call, Brady will contact them if these kids don’t pan out…
Lanz: harry Tage is right, you have to get rid of those rose colored glasses, look around... this cup is half empty…
Mo had heard enough blather, he walked over to the table with another round, this one on the house.
He set the drinks and some pretzels on the table and walked back to the bar. He picked up an object and carried it carefully over and set it down.
Mo: I have a crystal ball. A friend of a friend says its from the old Foxboro Stadium locker room, he left it here a few years back to cover his tab…had it sitting in the back seat of a Rambler parked out front.
My friends, I do have a crystal ball
I’ve been looking into it
What would you Pats fans say if I told you that after five games
the Patriots would:
-Have played the first 5 games without Gronk
-that Amendola has been a non factor since getting hurt in game one
-and Julian Edelman leads the team in receptions with 37
- that Zoltan Mesko is punting for the hapless Pittsburgh Steelers
-and that Ridley has an injured knee and has been pedestrian at best
-fatso Lagarrette Blount at 255 lbs is your kick returner and leading rusher
-that ShaneVereen is on IR until late November
-that Vince Wilfork is on IR with a torn Achilles tendon…
-that A guy named Chris Jones is your starting N T
-WR rookies Tomkins and Dobson have combined for 4 TD’s and 18 drops
-stud TE Zak Sudfeld is on the Jets
-that future HOF QB Tom Brady has a passer rating of 80 and has only thrown for more than 300 yards once in the five games
-and that Matt Mully Mulligan has the only TD by a TE
-this team is 31st in red zone offense only better than the Jags
And with all that being true…
The Pat’s will still be 4-1 and will be just one bad throw or bad drop away from pushing the Bengals into OT in the lone 7 pt loss
We don’t believe you, we aren’t buying that! said a chorus led by Oldharry…
You’ve lost your mind…
Next are you gonna tell us that the Red Sox dropped the Rays 3 games to1 in the ALDS and are hosting the Det/ Oak winner in the ALCS?
Or that the Dodgers are in the NLCS?
Or that the Chiefs are unbeaten?
Or or that the US government is in partial shut down?
Or that Beeze has a dog named Finnegan
Or that Peyton has thrown for 20 TD’s for the 5-0 Broncos
Eli has thrown 12 picks for the 0-5 Giants
Or that DVT has run out of one liners…
Crystal ball Mo?…
what kind of idiots do you think we are…