Tagged with "Super Bowl"
Weekly Grumble with IHM 1/19
Category: FEATURED
Tags: NFL Super Bowl Seahawks Packers Patriots Colts


  We interrupt your regularly scheduled Monday Moaning for this weekly grumble... Beeze wanted to pull the switcheroo this week, so now you're stuck with me instead today. In order to not dissapoint the masses, I gave you what you came for here at the top, a little gratuitous semi-nudity!

  As you all already know, the Patriots and Seahawks will square off in this year's Super Bowl. Both teams took very different routes to victory yesterday, with the Patriots dominating from the opening whistle and the Seahawks waiting until the final three minutes of the damn game to show up, but no matter what way you look at it, both teams earned a trip to the Super Bowl. I'll be honest, the Seahawks game pretty much took my will to watch any more football away... I fucking hate that team with a passion... so I'm glad I didn't miss a whole hell of a lot in the AFC Championship game! I watched until it was a 14-0 game, then I changed the channel. Of course, I checked back here and there to watch the progression of that beatdown, but the only interesting thing to happen was Nate Soldier making his way into the end zone and the fat guy celebration that ensued!

  So now the ball is in your court, Patriots! Beat the Seahawks, shut that loud mouthed idiot Dick Sherman up, and put that smug cocksucker Pete Carroll in his place...PLEASE! Hell, if you pull it off, I might renounce my fucking Lions fanship and hop aboard with you all. Hell, I'm moving the hell out of Michigan pretty soon here anyhow, so I might as well take advantage and find a team worth rooting for! If the Pats can pull it off, I'll be a happy man. If I watch more hot garbage like I did Sunday afternoon on Super Bowl Sunday, I might just say fuck the NFL all together.

  By the way, nice job Bostik... you know that fucking clown was cut before the team plane landed in Green Bay... probably as much for his own protection as for his inability to field a fucking onside kick! Enjoy your fifteen minutes of fame douchebag... you earned it. Kind of fits into those YOU HAD ONE JOB memes...

  Yeah... that's the stuff! But honestly, what are the odds this guy even sniffs another NFL job after that? I know there is a lot more blame to go around, especially to Green Bay coach Mike McCarthy for being such a pussy all game long on the play calls... but good fucking christ, talk about a boner of the year candidate this early in the year!

  So now we get two weeks of hype... two weeks of people trying to interview Marshawn Lynch for some fucking reason... and Lynch being a petulant child about it despite drawing attention to himself with stupid shit like he did Sunday... with yet another on field crotch grab. Real class act... but then again... what more do you expect out of a cat named Marshawn? And how much time do we need to spend talking about the fucking guy's cleats? He wanted to wear a pair, the league said no... end of story. In hindsight, I wish he would have worn em and been ejected! The guy is a damn good football player; but he's a few fries short of a Happy Meal!

  Elsewhere in sports, Max Scherzer has reportedly agreed to a seven year deal with the Washington Nationals, but no financial terms have been disclosed. It is believed that the Nationals will have to move Jordan Zimmerman and/or Ian Desmond before being able to take on the size of contract Scherzer is likely going to get. I know a lot of Tiger fans are mad he didn't re-sign last winter when he was offered five years and 140+ million dollars... but really they should be happy. It helped save the team from signing another stupid, bloated contract for a guy who is on the downside of his career (not getting any younger at 30) and who has a whopping total of two career complete games. He's a good pitcher, don't get me wrong... but he sure as hell isn't a guy I give a max deal to (no pun intended). The Tigers, as I have said a million times before, should have traded the guy immediately after he turned down the massive contract extension offered to him, when his value was highest and they still had control over him. But hey, what the fuck do I know... I'm just some piss ant fan!

  In all seriousness, good luck to him in Washington... no need to act like a jealous ex-girlfriend in all of this. That is one aspect of fan behavior I'll never get... the jealous rage we all seem to go into when a guy signs elsewhere. There is no such thing as loyalty in sports these days... get the fuck over it. If someone walked into your place of employment and offered you a three dollar an hour pay hike to come work for them, you'd be gone in a fucking second!

  The other big story this weekend was Joe Pa getting his wins back. Enjoy that hollow victory Pedo State... your legacy is still exactly what it was without them. A pathetic old man who cares more about the "status" of your program than the well being of children. Rot in pieces you apathetic old twat.

  Speaking of twats... how about Michael Moore. He was recently asked about the film "American Sniper" a biopic on the life of former serviceman Chris Kyle, directed by Clint Eastwood. Moore is quoted as saying that snipers are "cowards". Something tells me this fat puddle of shit would be singing a different tune if Kyle were alive to defend himself! Michael Moore, please jam another cheeseburger into that fat sasshole of yours before you enlighten us with any more of your bullshit... okay?

  The Pistons make their way to national TV today at 2:30 Eastern in a game against the East leading Atlanta Hawks on ESPN. First time in a couple of years I can remember that happening. Should be a good one... better than watching the Lakers/Knicks/Cavs like ESPN usually trots out there, anyhow!

  That's all I've got for today folks. Thanks as always for reading, and for any comments you leave on the way out. Have a week!



The Real Winner
Category: FEATURED
Tags: Carroll Seahawks Super Bowl


The more I digest the Stink Bowl, the more I gravitate toward the conclusion that MVP should have gone to none other than Cheatin' Pete Carroll.
Seattle dominated as a team, as in all 3 phases of the game. The most stunning stat may be that they did this with 341 yards of total offense. Subtract Harvin's kickoff return and early end-around from the totals and you have a meagre 234. Yet they scored on each first-half possession. It's a testimonial to Seattle's defense as much as it is to their domination of a team that showed up with a loaded gun pointed at its foot, opened by making an unforced mistake, and never stopped making mistakes, though aided largely by Seattle's defense from that point.
Denver's 4 turnovers were incredible, all the more so as 3 of them came from Manning and 1 from Thomas. None, of course, should have happened. Manning's 3 should have all been sacks as he realized he had nowhere to go with the ball and no time to find it. Thomas' was reminiscent of a play in the very similar Alabama upset of mighty Miami in 1993, back when the SEC was considered chicken feed for the South Florida semipro machine. You may recall George Teague stripping the ball from another shocked Thomas (Lamar) at the tail end of what looked like an 89-yard TD bomb from Gino Torretta.
But Dennis Erickson proved no match for Gene Stallings in preparing his team to finish its 2nd consecutive undefeated season. Miami was absolutely ambushed by 'Bama.
Flash forward to last Sunday. John Fox has been around. His Carolina teams were good until something funny happened. Jake DelHomme developed an incurable case of the Pix, a disorder which ultimately ended his career. Said career was prolonged for several seasons by Fox's inexplicable dedication to his faded QB. This year, with Jack Del Rio to run his defense and Peyton Manning to run his offense (Trivia question --- who's Denver's OC? Stumped? Matt Gase. Still stumped?) the Old Fox could finally just sit back and dispense ageless wisdom.
Meanwhile in Seattle, Pete Carroll was not only managing his team's growth, he was feeding it. His GM John Schneider surely won't make a move without Carroll. And in that light, the defense-minded Carroll assembled a defensive backfield so deep that nothing seems able to break it. It's a great focus on what has become a critical area in a passing league. Perhaps his stint at USC has given him drafting insight lacking in others. Whatever... it's working.
But something else is working. Though Carroll's offensive game plans are what one might call mundane at times (as in most of the time), his ability to motivate his team is without question. The bubbly, overbearing cheerleader has grown up. His players love him.
But it doesn't end there. John Fox isn't unpopular with his players. But he was clearly no match for Carroll in either game planning or team inspiration, areas the old pro should have dominated. He proved that as clearly as Erickson proved he wasn't a match for Stallings in 1993.
There are 32 teams in the NFL. It's the cap era. What are the odds that one 13-3 team would dominate another 13-3 team at every position (which is exactly what happened) due to talent? About as good as those of one major college football factory doing it to another. Less, actually.
It's coaching. While Seattle seized the advantage given them by Denver early on, Denver seemingly kept thinking it would all pass and things would just return to normal. They stayed the course rather than stem the tide. Seattle, meanwhile, refused to let up. That's a ready team. Even after everything seemed to go wrong for Denver in the first half, how many thought it must be a fluke and geared up for a 2nd-half comeback by an embarrassed and mad-as-hell Bronco squad? A lot, if I recall my surroundings correctly and extrapolate. How many still thought so after Harvin's 87-yard TD? Still a rare few I'd wager.
It never happened. Denver had already quit. That is a huge indictment of the team and its coach. It is also a vindication of Seattle's skill, but even more of its team persona. Champions don't quit. That's a given. Seattle not only didn't quit, they didn't even pause long to catch their breath.
Credit for that goes to Carroll on both possible counts, first for building a team that could frustrate the paper horse into early submission, second for coaching a team that never lost its single-minded focus.
In that light, Carroll did something even Belichick hasn't done. Belichick won his three rings with a defense (and a secondary) largely assembled during the tenures of Parcells and Carroll. Since that time he's drafted well, but never for his secondary, and his teams have become offense-oriented. It's well known by now that Parcells never won anything big without Belichick at his side. The other side of the coin may be that Belichick hasn't won the big one without Parcells drafting his defense. Or Carroll.
In Seattle, Carroll did both.


Deep Thoughts 2-5-2014
Category: FEATURED
Tags: Super Bowl XLVIII Seahawk domination Peyton Manning remains great Tom Brady Richard Sherman Tracy McGrady Jameius Winston baseball UTPA Broncs


Hello and welcome to another Wednesday of deep thoughts. The big game is over and Seattle convinced me that they are the best team in football. A few weeks ago…I wrote this:


The Super Bowl will be a study in contrast. Seattle has earned the right to be considered a great defense. They have the athleticism, aggressiveness and sure tackling to be called an elite defense. When you add the beast mode of Lynch it is hard to say that they should not have the advantage in the cold of New York. Much will be made about the weather and how Peyton Manning has struggled in the past. The one aspect of the weather that I think will affect this game is the wind. Cold and windy has to bring an advantage for the Seahawks. As I think about this game, there is one thing that continues to make me think that Denver will win; Julius Thomas. Who does Seattle have to cover this guy? Denver has so many weapons, that it is not a matter of just shutting down the wide receivers. My guess is that ultimately, the experience of Peyton Manning will beat the inexperience of Russell Wilson.


A week before that, I wrote this:


The odds are that whichever team wins this game will be losing to the NFC in the Super Bowl. Remember that defense wins championships…right?


I remember thinking that and I remember writing it. Somehow, my heart convinced my head that Denver could beat the Seahawks. All season, I watched Manning destroy defense after defense. It just seemed to be right that Denver would win the Super Bowl. But, just as Brady was unable to cap off his great season with a championship…Manning and his Broncos fell a game short as well. Honestly, Joe Montana and Jerry Rice in their prime would not have defeated this Seattle team. The Seattle Seahawks proved that they are one of the best teams in history. As much as I wanted to see Peyton Manning win another championship, it is fitting that this Seahawks team won. Despite Richard Sherman’s outburst a few weeks ago, this group of players is a team…and a damn good one. Russell Wilson will probably never pass for 5000 yards and the beautiful thing is he won’t have to. The Seahawks have figured out the key to winning is to play together.  The key to beating Denver and any team with a great QB is pressure up the middle. There is no question that Seattle did this better than any team this year. Honestly, I am short of adjectives to laude on this Seattle defense. Their performance in the Super Bowl puts them on the short list of great defenses.



I read an interesting article about Pete Carroll before the NFL season started. He approaches the game much differently than most coaches. He is lose, but focused on making his team better. His method is different, but effective. Just when I get to the point when I must concede that he is a very good coach, I happened to hear him talking about the Super Bowl being just like it was when he won at USC.  Arrogant and annoying are the words that come to mind when I think about Pete Carroll. Well, even if I don’t care for him…I must say that the man can coach. Now, the question will be how many championships can Seattle win? Or, can they even win their conference next season? This is a young team that really could go on a run of wins. But the difficult part is maintaining focus and staying healthy. The other thing that Seattle will face is other teams signing away their players. Now dominating defense will be in vogue and other teams will begin to play the copycat game. Honestly, I don’t blame them. It will be interesting to see if the offensive numbers continue to flourish or whether the emphasis on defense will bring a downturn. I know that if I am John Elway and John Fox that I don’t wait long until I have a meeting to plan on revamping their defense.  Boy…that will be big job.  


One of the things that I firmly believe is that you can learn more about a person in a loss than in a victory. It is easy to smile, shake hands and sign autographs after winning a big game. It is entirely something else after suffering a big loss. Many have been quick to criticize Peyton Manning after the loss to the Seahawks. Does winning or losing really change the ability of Manning? Players and coaches seem to understand the greatness of Manning if some fans do not. The Patriot writer Tom Curran routinely asks Tom Brady to review his ballot for the league awards each year. When Brady saw that Curran had Brady down as the MVP…he told Curran that the MVP should be Peyton Manning. Curran made the change. Richard Sherman came to Peyton Manning’s defense on twitter as many fans were lambasting Manning. Sherman admonished the fans by saying Manning is still a great player and a future HOFer. Sherman also related that Manning found him after the game to check on his injury…because that is who Peyton Manning is.


Imagine for a moment that you are Peyton Manning and you have just walked off the field after losing the Super Bowl. Because you are Manning, you are expected to talk to the media. After answering questions about losing the game, you begin the long trip to the locker room. Along the way, a beer vendor respectfully requests an autograph. What would you do? Manning told the man (Steve Lopez) that he would come back after he changed. Lopez waited and Manning came back and gave him an autograph…because that he who Peyton Manning is. I don’t spend much time wondering about the order of great players. I only know one when I see one. Bum Phillips used to say when asked where he would rank Earl Campbell among great running backs…"I don’t know if he is in a class by himself, but when that class gets together, it does not take long to call roll." A player’s legacy is something that is left when they finish playing. It is folly to determine a legacy before their time is done. In my heart, I know that Peyton Manning and Tom Brady will forever be linked as great QBs, competitors and friends. In many ways, the relationship reminds me of Larry Bird and Magic Johnson. These guys understand just how difficult it is to win in the NFL. They recognize that winning a Super Bowl is not as much about them as it is about their team.


We are witnessing a golden age of QB play and many are too enamored with the drama to understand this. If Russell Wilson or Colin Kaepernick win 5 Super Bowls, will they be better than Manning or Brady? For my money, they are not even close. But, it is not fair to make this guess before the body of work is complete. To judge Peyton Manning before he is done is similarly unfair. To Peyton Manning’s credit, he simply does not take the bait when asked about an embarrassing loss…because that is not who he is. But for me…it shows me who those are that ask these types of questions. For those that refuse to acknowledge the greatness of a player such as Manning…it is more about you than Peyton Manning.


Great teams win Super Bowls…not players. Just ask Eli…


The 2014 NFL season is over. There is no question that the best team won. I would be remiss to not take a moment to tip my hat to the greatness of the champs! A tip of the hat to the Seahawks for a job well done…





With the talk of great QB’s, I saw something this week that was something else. Do you remember the big lefty QB from Kentucky a few years back named Jared Lorenzen? You may remember that he won a Super Bowl ring while backing up Eli Manning. In case you have not seen him recently, I wanted to give you the big man that can…











I have to give it to Jim Rome…he has the quote of the year for me. "The XFL had He Hate Me. The CIFL has He Ate Me." Now…tell me you aren’t laughing at that! Too funny!!






  It's coming...


Although today is National Signing Day for college football, my focus has shifted to baseball. It should give a warm thought to my northern friends to hear that pitchers and catchers begin reporting to spring training as early as Friday. My son’s first college baseball game is on Valentine’s Day. So, I will be bringing weekly updates on the UTPA Broncs as they progress through their season.




While I am on college baseball…did you see that Jameius Winston was named as a pre-season All American? I think it is great that Winston is allowed to play baseball at Florida State…but a pre-season All American? It is clear that Winston’s success on the football field has given him an edge on this season. Here are Winston’s stats from last year:

At the plate, he hit .235 with seven doubles, three triples and 21 runs scored. Winston made 22 starts in the outfield and 10 at designated hitter.

On the mound, the right-hander went 1-2 with a 3.00 ERA and two saves, striking out 21 batters in 27 innings. His fastball can touch 95 mph.

Coach Martin indicates that he plans for Winston to be the Seminole closer as well as playing some outfield and being a designated hitter. It sounds like Winston will be a busy man this spring. This is a very good team and Winston may have the chance to live up to his preseason hype. It could be that another QB is talking about Omaha before this year is over.



                                                                      He might want to tuck that glove...




Another bit of baseball news I heard this week is that former NBA player Tracy McCrady is going to take a shot at baseball. He plans to try out with the Sugar Land Skeeters. McGrady is working out as a pitcher and has supposedly had a bit of help from Roger Clemens. Clemens tweeted that McGrady was throwing in the mid 80s and has decent stuff. McGrady says he throws a fastball, split, slider and change-up. If McGrady can really learn to pitch, being 6’8” would have to help. At 34 years old, he has a few good years left in him. Given that he is working with Clemens…who knows, he might pitch for another 10 years or so!


I heard a pretty good joke this week:

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the ...pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom! When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl. "Oh, yes" she replied, "isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter!" The pastor fainted.




I have to add just a few thoughts about the Texas basketball team. After a complete disaster last year, Rick Barnes had to completely remake the 2014 Longhorn team. Although they were picked last in the Big 12, they are suddenly on a very nice run in the Big 12. They have won 7 games in a row, including a big win last Saturday against a tough Kansas team. From what I have heard, Coach Barnes struggled with the group of guys last year. Apparently the group last year resisted coaching and were more interested in playing for themselves than the team. This year it is not the case. Cameron Ridley and Jonathan Holmes present a very strong inside presence that gives Texas a decided rebound advantage each game. Freshman Isaiah Taylor is playing with confidence that has made Texas a tough team to beat. It is fun to be able to follow a team again that plays the game hard. Texas may not win the Big 12...but they are in the conversation now.





That is all I have today, but I will leave you with a bit of Jack Handey...


"If you get invited to your first orgy, don't just show up nude. That's a common mistake. You have to let nudity 'happen.'"


"Don't ever get your speedometer confused with your clock, like I did once, because the faster you go the later you think you are."



Thanks for stopping by and feel free to leave a few deep thoughts of your own…




Q-o-t-D 2/3/14 Tags: NFL Super Bowl Commercials


What was your favorite Super Bowl Commercial?



Monday Moaning 2-3-14
Category: FEATURED
Tags: NFL Super Bowl Seattle Seahawks Denver Broncos The Beeze


How do you spell domination?   SEAHAWKS!  Seattle Seahawks!

All the hype...All the speculation...All the prognostication...And very few people favored the Seahawks...And no one expected to see them totally dominate Peyton Manning and the Denver Broncos...But they did...43-8


How do you show your dominance?  Start by winning the coin toss, and giving Manning the ball first...Boom, snap over Manning's head, out of the end zone, Safety!  Give us the ball! No problem moving the ball, field goal...Manning and company couldn't seem to get things on track...Another field goal...Manning INT...Seattle TD...Another Manning INT returned 69 yards for a TD from MVP, Malcom Smith...Shutout 22-0 going into the half....


The second half, Seattle picked up where they left off, with Percy Harvin taking the opening kick back 87 yards for a TD...Mix in a couple Denver fumbles...another TD...Then at the end of the third, the Broncos finally get a TD and 2 pointer...So Seattle drove down and fired in another TD...Then let the defense continue shutting the Broncos offense down...


Now it's easy to shit all over Manning...Him and his big stupid blockhead, in those damn Papa John's commercials...Couple of douchebags they are...But this wasn't just Manning throwing picks and going to choke city again...The whole Broncos team was out-played, and out-coached...I never like Carroll when he was at USC, but he's been able to take his winning ways to the NFL...This team bought into his plan...It didn't matter what Denver did...They were beat in every aspect of the game...



All my life I've been taught defense wins championships...Well, even in a NFL that has done whatever it can to make life easier for QB's and offenses, the Seahawks proved the old theory to still be true...



I loved this game...I mean, I've been all in with The Seahawks since I quit the Browns last year...Plus I hate the Broncos, and I hate the Mannings...Many people were complaining about it being a snoozer on Twitter...Well sure it was, if you were rooting for Denver, or just rooting for a close game...But for me, and all Seattle fans, this game was fucking awesome! My favorite Super Bowl!


But it was fun watching Twitter...The commercials seemed to be a letdown for most people...I know I stopped watching them, so I could check Twitter and Facebook...

here's some tweets I enjoyed...

Dennis Manoloff       

"Brad Johnson still has as many Super Bowl rings as Peyton Manning."


Eric Stangel       

"It's a bad sign when the Pro Bowl is more competitive than the Super Bowl…"


The Fake ESPN       

"One Denver Broncos player can change a flat tire by himself. Unless it's a blowout, then the whole team shows up."


opie radio       

 " #blowout - Fox might want to consider telling Erin Andrews to take a shower to keep people tuned in"


After the Don Cheadle llama commercial with all kinds of other shit going on...


Jim Norton       

"I wish that llama had shit on the elevator"


Justin Termine       

"John Fox should tell Manning this game is meaningless."


Tim McNeeley       

"Is there enough pot in Denver to forget how fucking awful your team has played!?! #Seahawks"


After a shot of Michael Douglas stuffing a hot dog in his face...


Jenny Johnson

"Hey Michael Douglas. Hot dogs are more unhealthy than pussy :("


And postgame...


Betsy Kling - WKYC       

"SideNote: #SuperBowl champ QB Wilson went in the 3rd round of draft in 2012. In that same draft, the #Browns chose Brandon Weeden in 1st."


But after all this Super Bowl talk, and Seattle love, I may have to quit the NFL after reading THIS article this Sunday morning...

That's it folks...Way to make me look good Seahawks...

Have a week...



The Beeze.

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