Monday Moaning 6-20-11
Category: FEATURED
Tags: NHL MLB Kate Upton Boston Little Beeze Boston Bruins Asdrubal Cabrera Vancouver Canucks Vancouver The Beeze

  They're getting really good at throwing Championship parties in Boston! Nice B-Cups!

Yeah, they have every right to run smack...Boston has been doing some serious ass-kicking over the last ten years...I saw one sign being held by a little kid, that said something like, 'I'm 8 years old and I can die now!' Then it had Pats Championship checked off...Sox Championship checked off...Celtics Championship checked off...And Bruins Championship checked off...I'm just hoping to see 1 championship in the Cleve, before I drop dead!

I would have posted that picture, but I came across this one...

Like I said, they've got this Championship party thing down in Boston!

Oh and here's one for Burrows and his buddies in Vancouver...

Oh, how's your city doing assholes? What too soon? What a STAIN...

So now that Hockey's long-ass season is over, and we're waiting for Football, we have Baseball, and their grossly, way to long season to help kill the time...There has been all kinds of talk about realignment and rule changes and blah, blah, blah...Here's what I would do if I was the all-powerful, ruler of Baseball...

1. DH for everyone...Screw the National League and their purists...DH in both leagues creates more jobs...The Union would love it, and that's good 'cause at some point we're gonna need their support on something...With the rare exception, watching Pitchers hit is like watching a retarded monkey try to hump a Football...

2. Shorten the season...No more cold ass April games...Season will start in May...No more World Series on a cold October/November evening...Season will end 1st week of October at the latest, so passionate, purists can still say "Fall/October Classic"...

3. No Interleague play...The beauty of the "All-Star" Game and World Series is not having seen your opponent...Us vs. Them...These ass-hats want the "All-Star" game to count for home field in the World Series, then this adds to the competitiveness...

4. No fan voting for the "All-Star"...If it's gonna count, then the teams should be picked to make it count, and it should be played to count...And then you wouldn't have a douchebag like Jeter ahead of Asdrubal Cabrera in the voting...Since Cabrera is fucking killing it! Not just with the bat either...10 years ago, Jeter wouldn't have made this play the Cabrera made Sunday...

So that's my plan...What do you got?

Sunday was Father's Day...Often Father's Day seems like an afterthought to many people...Bu not at the Beeze's house...After I got up early with the baby, once everyone else woke up, the Mrs. sent me back to bed...About an hour and a half later, the Little Beeze woke me up and said, "Dad, don't come down stairs yet, I'm not done with your surprise!" I of course obliged, and went back to sleep...And hour later he woke me up, and put his wrapped up surprise in my face...I got up and opened it...My boy who loves his arts and crafts, made me a poster full of pictures of him and his sisters...I was very proud, and I was happy to see the pictures of him when he was much smaller and didn't swear so much!

The wife made dinner later in the day, which is always rare, and exciting...Yes, it was good...It a fun and restful day with the kids...What else can I ask for?

There is another Little Beeze story I have to share...Every Friday is Pizza night here...This week, when the delivery came, it was female driver...He heard the voice, and when I closed the door, he asked, "Was she hot!?!" I replied "No" He was bothered by this, assuming all women are hot, and asked why...I had to say, "she just wasn't." He really had a problem with this, so I told him, "Hot girls don't have to deliver pizza." The Mrs. didn't like this response, but come on now gang...It's true...

So the boy asked, "What is a hot girl?" SO I showed him the end of my blog from a couple weeks ago...You know the one, with Kate Upton doing the "Dougie"...This is a hot girl...

The wife again wasn't happy, when her 6 year old boy kept saying, "She's so hot!"

That's it for now...Have a week...

Later, The Beeze.


Remembering so we don't forget! Richie Evans
Category: FEATURED

Thoughts from an Island Girl


If we remember our place in this world,   then will not harbor notions that we are immortal.    If we are young we will not forsake those who come before and even paid the price for our sakes now.     Recently,   Richie Evans was inducted into NASCAR's Hall of Fame.     He never drove in any of the Big Three Series but he is remembered as a true legend.    

Kyle Petty gave him a shout out too !   Richie amassed over 500 career features.    His cars were notable for the orange paint and the number 61,    That number has been retired because racing fans will never forget and rightfully so.  

Watching the Hall of Fame program,  there was a full size edition of his Modified behind the emcees.    This is the only way that our generation will know of him and what he did in his day,    We learn that old school and new school are basically the same,   though the cars and dates change,   we are witnessing something so precious and taking the time out to get to know them.

When our own day has passed,  we will more fully understand his induction.    They will not be merely old people who dress funny,

Some have disputed Evans place amongst NASCAR deities or that other drivers are more deserving than Richie.    That is the problem,   because Richie died over 25 years ago,  racing!    For those who talk of Mr Evans and that includes his fellow competitors,   their eyes light up.   Even they get it.    They may be old school but they are true giants.  

  Geoff Bodine,  a driver from the somewhat recent past,   actually won 55 features in a single season driving modified.   A record in the Guiiness Book of World Records.   This is the kind of competition Evans faced,  week in and week out.  The real measure of a man,   if you would.    



I heard that recently Buzzie Reutiman has won over 1,200 features.   He is a star from Florida and the dad of NASCAR's David Reutiman and I am sure that Buzzie and perhaps David,  know of Richie Evans.    Mr Evans was racing royalty and all these stars from all around the country are making their own mark on the sport.     You know the older current drivers have their own stories.    Like the military veterans who have their war stories.  

 I remember a joke about what is the difference between a war story and a fishing one?    The fisherman says it was so big but it got away and the veteran says,   'this really happened,  no bullshit'.   Better than just war stories and fishing escapes are Halls of Fame.     Where notable warriors of a generation and the supporting cast are not forgotten,     In this year's inductees,   the only one not on hand was Richie and I am sorry that I am too young to not have know him.     But thanks to NASCAR and their appreciation of old racers,   I will!!!   Long live Richie in racing heaven and God bless the current drivers,  


 May they live long enough to make a difference,.



STFU Saturday with IHM
Category: FEATURED



  Well folks, this week 3rd Stone from the Sun was unable to make his usual Saturday post... in his place, you're stuck with me again. But I promise to do my best to fill in admirably... and if you don't like what you read, I'll send you your money back!

  This week, there have been a lot of stupid people doing and saying stupid things... Pryor's "apology", Vancouver fans going apeshit because their team shit the bed, NFL players and owners making zero progress and, of course, Bron Bron and his big mouth and inability to perform when it counts. This week, I will rant and rave about each of the four, and in the end, it is up to you folks to decide who is this week's recipient of the STFU award. Call it "tool of the week" without the award plunger... more like some duct tape over the mouth and maybe a pimp smack or two for good measure!  

  The first batter is a Mr.Terrelle Pryor, former starting quarterback for the Ohio State Buckeyes. Seems Pryor feels bad enough about what he's done to make a half-assed, three minute apology to the university, its' fans, and of course, "Papa" Tressel. Of course, the entire thing was more of a self-promotion stunt dreamed up by "super agent" and all around bag of shit Drew Rosenhaus... who claims Pryor is a "first round pick", even in the supplemental draft.

  My first rant on Pryor... am I the only one who is just sick and tired of half-assed, fake apologies from all of these jackasses. Six months later, I don't really need to hear that you "never intended to harm anyone directly or indirectly. Wow... indirectly... the ten minutes you spent in class at OSU must really be paying off Tyrelle. Honestly, just one time, I want someone to come out and tell the truth. Tell the people what really happened... you wanted something, you obtained it illegally, and you didn't give a fuck THEN what you were doing and certainly don't give a fuck NOW. The only thing you regret is getting caught. Like a guy getting caught fucking around on his old lady... it's not your fault, it's hers for not putting out enough. In Pryor's case, it's the NCAA's fault for not compensating him enough to be able to afford fancy cars, tats, and whatever the hell else he took during the three years he spent as a Buckeye.

  As for apologizing to Tressel... you owe him nothing. He made plenty of money while you worked like a dog to drive his stock up a few more points. He made well over $2 million while you risked being injured and possibly never making one red cent for playing football in your life. Not to mention the fact that even before you came along in 2008 or 2009, Tressel had already amassed a laundry list of NCAA violations. Long story short... fuck you and your "father figure". You're both embarrasments to the university you represent and the organization you represent, the NCAA. But honestly, both were more or less polished terds before either one of you came along.

  As for Drew Rosenhaus thinking you are a first-rounder... don't bet on it. Hell, personally, I say you're damaged goods... you were never that great of a passer, and unless you suddenly develop Michael Vick's speed, NFL defenses are fast enough to catch up to you. I wouldn't touch you with a seventh round pick myself... but I'm sure somebody will take a flier on you... probably not til the 4th round at the earliest... but somebody'll draft you. Sure, you'll probably throw twice the number of picks as touchdowns for your career, and spend five to ten years as a third stringer before you quit... but you'll get into the league. Then you can get all the tats you want, and sell all the memoribillia you want. Just make sure you let the IRS know about that... they don't wear the same kind of kids' gloves that Ohio State or even the NCAA does.

  Now, on to fans of the Vancouver Canucks, who took to the streets after their teams' game 7 loss to the Boston Bruins, and proceeded to riot, killing at least one, and leading to a pointless news story while I was trying to watch TV about important things about some couple of dolts making out in the middle of the mayhem. Honestly folks, this is a good gauge to what things are going to start to become. Kids come up in an era where "everybody's a winner"... everybody gets a trophy, not the winning team... because everybody is so fucking special. When people are brought up and sheltered from any incarnation on failure, they react poorly once finally exposed to it. These are the kinds of douchebags you see rioting in the streets over a freaking hockey game. Get your priorities straight dipshits.

  As for the NFL players association, DeMaurcie Smith, and the NFL's owners... just meet somewhere in the middle and don't fuck up the gravy train you have going on like baseball did back in 1994. You are hands down the most popular sport in America right now... just as baseball was back then. Sure, most fans will come filing back into the stadiums well before the ink dries on the new CBA... but there are fans out there that will hold a grudge. Just ask baseball owners... ask them how hard it was to win back fans after their strike. It took a drug induced assault on the record books to even get people's attention again... and now THAT is an even bigger black eye on the sport than the strike and missing World Series was. Figure it the fuck out, sing cum-by-ya together, and get back to work.

  As for LeBron James... I've said my piece on most of it. Do yourself a favor BronBron... spend some of the "billion dollars" you plan on becoming the first professional athlete to accumulate and invest in a decent PR guy. Somebody to tell you when what you're planning to say is about the farthest thing from what fans want to hear you say... which is pretty much every time you open your mouth. Quit with the tweets, quit with the holier than thou attitude, and quit disappearing every time you are in a big game that actually matters.

  Well folks, there's your candidates... and voting opens NOW! Chime in in the comments section below, and, as always, thanks for reading. Have a great weekend, and an early happy father's day to all the Gab dads out there. And just to choke everybody up a little... ladies and gentlemen... Mr.Harry Chapin.



Five Minute Frags - A Realized Retraction
Category: FEATURED
Tags: MLB Toronto Blue Jays Jose Bautista Pittsburgh Pirates New York Yankees

It is no secret that man is fallible. The gift of free will and opinion opens man up to discovery, but it also makes him prone to mistakes.


Such is the case with a writer, especially one like me who opts to write editorial style pieces that are smothered in personal opinion and conjecture. That said, I think you’d find it rare when such a writer opts to review something that they’ve written in the past, and even rarer when that same writer chooses to reevaluate his writing and recant his opinion.


I’m all about bucking the trend.


In this case, I’m referring to a piece I wrote last year about the performance of Jose Bautista of the Toronto Blue Jays. In that article, I compared Bautista’s improbable 2010 performance to that of Baltimore’s Brady Anderson and Arizona’s Luis Gonzalez, among others. I may even have alluded to possible steroid usage, even though I danced around the subject.


I owe Bautista an apology.


In the article, I wrote the following:


“That said Bautista has a chance to step it up next year, after some team rewards him with a large multi-year contract, to prove that he is clean. Obviously, he has the benefit of the doubt right now, as Major League Baseball has a testing policy in place and they are working toward testing for HGH in another season or two.”


Well, I highly doubt that Jose Bautista read said article, but he certainly has responded to my challenge.  As of this writing, he is tied for the Major League lead with 21 home runs, is 10th in the American League in RBI with 45, and is second to only Adrian Gonzalez in the AL with a .332 batting average.


In the same article, I compared Bautista’s achievement to that of Cecil Fielder, in that they were both late bloomers that overcame running around the league and in Fielder’s case the world, to put up power numbers that they hadn’t previously exhibited. Well, that may have been unfair to Bautista, at least as far as this year’s numbers are stating. Fielder was prone to the strike-out, as were many of his teammates on those Tiger’s teams of the early 1990’s. Bautista, while striking out 116 times in 2010, has seemingly corrected that flaw in 2011, whiffing just 38 times in 214 at-bats. He’s also on pace to walk close to 120 times, a product of the protection he no longer enjoys this season.


Long story short, Bautista is showing that he was deserving of the long-term deal the Jays gave him over the winter and that his 2010 season was no fluke. If anything, it is proof that a hitter can grow late in his career.


All he needs is a chance and someone to believe in him, including fans and writers.


Other Fragments:


  • Last week I mentioned how the Pittsburgh Pirates were on the cusp on a winning record and they promptly responded by dropping two games. Well, it finally happened this week when the Bucs put together a four-game win streak and now sit at 35-33 on the season. More incredibly, they are just 3 games out of first place. Awkwardly enough, they are doing it on the back of a young pitching staff that ranks 8th in baseball in ERA. Here’s to hoping they keep it up.


  • The Yankees are playing some creative baseball with their pitching staff, starting career minor-leaguer, and converted outfielder, Brian Gordon in yesterday’s game. This while also having utilized reclamation projects in Freddie Garcia and Bartolo Colon to decent results. But can a team built like that continue to defy logic and find a way to win on that backs of that staff?


  • The Oakland Athletics fired manager Bob Geren last week as the team went into a deep slide. However, maybe what really should be questioned is whether or not Billy Beane is still the right man to steer the ship. Certainly, Beane earned his stripes with daring moves and brilliant trades in the past, but baseball is all about what have you done for me lately, and Beane hasn’t shown any such magic in the last few seasons. At this stage, he may be hard-pressed to hold his job long enough to see the Moneyball movie hit theaters. 
Rants and Raves
Category: FEATURED
Tags: LeBron James MLB Lenny Dykstra Mikhail Prokhorov Dallas Mavericks


Advice for King James, Lenny Dykstra strikes, Mavericks, Bruins and more in this edition of Rants and Raves.


If I am LaBron James, I am taking the low road this off-season. You know the old saying, “out of site, out of mind.” Go on vacation, don’t do commercials or interviews. Do charitable work, and practice at your craft.


The concept of realignment seems odd. More teams have a chance to fight for a playoff spot now, why would MLB even considered it. It is like going back to 1968, the last year before divisions were placed.

Two leagues of 15 teams with the top 5 teams making the playoff. All it does is add one more playoff team. Major League Baseball can do that now just by adding another playoff spot in each league.


Now batting, Lenny Dykstra.

First pitch, strike one, high and tight, financial and legal problems

Second pitch, strike two, takes looking, cocaine, ecstasy and human growth hormone

Strike three, swinging, 25 misdemeanor and felony counts of grand theft auto, attempted grand theft auto, identity theft and other stupid stuff.

When will it end?? How about prison time.


New Jersey Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov is now a “loyal opposition” to Russia’s top leaders. He was handpicked by President Dmitry Medvedev as a safe man to lead an opposition party that will lightly criticize the Kremlin but avoid any real dissent. The Party is called the “Right Cause” as is favored by Russia’s business elite, and best and brightest people.


Congratulations to the Dallas Mavericks for winning the NBA Championship. You weren’t even suppose to make it pass the first round, yet you easily beat the Lakers, you took care of the Thunder and you made “King” James look more like a “Princess” in the finals.

It goes to show that collusion doesn’t always work.


Anything inside Terrelle Pryor’s brain. Hello, Hello, McFly, anyone in their??

"I say sorry to all the Buckeye nation and all the Buckeye fans across the country," Pryor said. "I never meant to hurt anybody directly or indirectly with my conduct off the field and I am truly sorry."

"In terms of coach Jim Tressel, a special shoutout," Pryor said. "I'm sorry for what all went down and I apologize with all my heart. I love you just like a father. You taught me a lot and I apologize for putting you in a situation and taking you out of a job and place that you loved to be. I regret the fact that you're not there any more and I regret the fact that I'm not there any more."

It is a little too late for the damage control drill, you moron.


Derek Jeter is on the 15-day disable list for a grade-1 strain of the calf. Let me see he is six hits shy of 3,000, with a 6 game road trip coming up. Are they Yankees waiting for Jeter to come home to get his 3,000 hit???


For those that are interested, there are only 79 days left before the Big East football starts.


Congratulations go out to the Boston Bruins for winning their first Stanley Cup since 1972. It was a great NHL Finals.

Meanwhile, fans of the Vancouver Canucks suck. Drunken fans set cars and garbage cans ablaze, smashing windows, showering giant TV screens with beer bottles and dancing atop overturned vehicles. Later, looters smashed windows and ran inside department stores. An hour after the game ended, troublemakers started hurling garbage and bottles at police officers, who deflected the debris with riot shields. Protesters who rushed the police line were quickly subdued with blows from a truncheon. Protesters held what looked like pipes or hockey sticks over their heads as they jeered at officers. Newspaper boxes were wrenched off the sidewalk and hurled through store windows. Portable toilets were tipped as the stifling black smoke spread through the city's core. Some seemed to revel in the rampage, recording the vandalism on cell phones and video cameras. A few congratulated those who tried to attack police, and others erupted with cheers every time something was damaged. Fans set fire to a stuffed bear decorated to symbolize the Bruins, while others sang a drunken tune as they danced on an overturned vehicle.


Pictures by: Lebron James - themajors.net, MLB Logo - 3.bp.blogspot.com, James/Bosh/Wade - thestartingfive.net, Lenny Dykstra - sportsradiointerviews.com, Mikhail Prokhorov - media.silive.com, Dallas Mavericks - 1.bp.blogspot.com 

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