All that money you making and you can't get a fade??? See Head Slap
Greetings from the Hoodwood, where there have been a stunning increase in the number of Southern Cal and Michigan paraphernalia around. Im warning you, iif you like Notre Dame or Ohio State, you might want to skip the column this week they get no love
College football: Nightmare on My Street
Back in the late 80s DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince made a tune called “Nightmare on My Street” it was based on the popular Nightmare on Elm Street movies. In a sense, Im hearing this song on my head as Im looking over the broken and battered landscape that is college football. Of course if you are a fan of Notre Dame all is right in the world again. Notre Dame has used its cookie schedule and a host of upsets over he last two weeks to ascend to the top of the BCS standings. With unbeaten Ohio State unable to steal their thunder due to their probation. Notre Dame is the top dog in college football. Kansas State got housed at Baylor and Orgeon lost an overtime thriller against Stanford…the top two BCS ranked team to an L for the first time since 2005. Kansas State came out with considerable stage fright being the hunted and it showed as in front of a crazy crowd in Waco, Baylor took the fight to the Wildcats and thrashed them 52-24 behind 185 yards rushing by Leach Seastrunk including an 80 yard run that capped off a 24 point 3rd quarter that buried the Wildcats for good. At about the same time another upset was being hatched, as Stanford went into the feared Autzen Zoo and held one of the nations most high powered offense in check and won 17-14. Check that score for Oregon they only scored 14 points…for the game. Not a half not a quarter… for the whole game. In the 40 quarters before last Saturday game, the Ducks had scored 14 or more points in a quarter 24 times. The Cardinal just shut down the high powered Duck offense like a boss.
So what happens? Notre Dame sleepwalks through another cookie game, beating Wake Forest 38-0. They now are one win from an unbeaten season and will make only their 3rd true road game. (The games in Ireland and Chicago they were the home team) But of course facing a depleted USC team that was once the #1 ranked team but now cant even win their division in the Pac-12 without help and without stud QB Matt Barkley. My only hope may rest with Bama but that wont be till January. Which mean 6 weeks of listening to Irish fans say that they were with them all along and that the college football world is back to being right since the Irish are “back”. (Pause while your humble scribe vomits.) Its so bad, I almost wish that Ohio State could face them, thrash them and shut them up. But since the Buckeyes are going nowhere but home after playing Michigan this weekend, all we will here is Ohio State fans sniping at Notre Dame fans saying “You didn’t play us…” This is going to be a long December…being the Notre Dame hater that I am. I may be forced to be an SEC honk and shill for the next month…if only USC could get it together…Speaking of that hot mess…
College Football: Lane Kiffin, he really hasn’t risen so how can we call it a fall?
I really never been a big fan of Lane Kiffin, the snarky young head coach of USC. Go all the way back to when he was a snarky offensive coordinator under another snarky head coach Pete Carroll, he had this annoying style about him and has been the football version of Larry Brown, jumping from one job to the other and making plenty of enemies along the way. His name is a dirty word in Knoxville where after a rocky season in Rocky Top he bolted for the greener pastures of SoCal. Kiffin’s return to the West Coast was not greeted by all and he’s felina non grata (cat not welcome in Northern California where he went 5-15 as coach of the Oakland Raiders in 2007 and 2008. But as Kiffin started with the #1 team in the country as USC was coming off of 2 years of probation a a pair of decent seasons. The Trojans started decent, winning their first two games before getting ambushed by Stanford up on the farm in September. The Trojans won their next four before getting upset at Arizona, housed by Oregon, and humiliated by their hated in-city rival UCLA. The catcalls are coming more and more to AD Pat Haden to get rid of Kiffin who seemingly is making tons of enemies in the 90089 ZIP code with banning beat writers from practices, keeping visitors from doing walk throughs at the ancient LA Coliseum and then saying that it wasn’t his call when it really was, having an underling student manager deflate footballs then feigning ignorance about the whole thing. That and lying often when he is caught is making Kiffin look bad and USC look worse at a time when it is trying to clean up its image and get back to prominence in the national spotlight. The Trojans cant even claim the city title this year as they have to watch their despised rival Bruins head to the Pac-12 title game that was so much a foregone conclusion for them in September. They are the first #1 team since the 1964 Ole Miss team to start the season #1 and manage to fall out of the Top 25. With the aforementioned Notre Dame coming in this week, it would be a serious coup if the Trojans could win, what once looked like a walkover for USC, now looks the other way in the Irish’s favor. Sad fall from grace indeed.
College Sports: Maryland & Rutgers to the Big Ten…HUH??
It just came down the wire as I’m writing it so all the details are still a bit sketchy, but ACC charter member Maryland and Big East Orginal Rutgers are bolting their respective conferences for the Big Ten . Though respected scribes like Gene Wojciechowski saw it coming, most didn’t. I was at the Rutgers-Cincinnati game this past Saturday and despite the Scarlet Knights win over my beloved Bearcats don’t think that they are Big Ten (plus two) material. Look, I understand that Big Ten head poobah Jim Delaney has long coveted the huge metro TV markets that Rutgers (New Jersey and New York) and Maryland (DC and Baltimore) have and trying to keep the Big Ten jostling with the ACC and SEC who have expanded to 14 and 16 teams respectively. But now who will the ACC poach? My best guess is Louisville to give them another solid basketball team and a rising football team. Though many say that UConn would be a good fit and carry over rivaries with Pitt and Syracuse as well as new rivalries with Boston College. As much as I would love to see my beloved Bearcats get the call but I cant see it happening. The dizzying array of moves may not be over yet. Im hearing rumbling that Boise State, San Diego State and BYU may either stay or return to the Mountain West...Stay tuned.
PHAT DAP/HEAD SLAP
A pair, the first to Chaminade, the host school of the Maui Classic, 30 years after their storied upset of #1 Virginia they pulled another upset this time of Texas. Am I the only that think its funny that the Silver Swords "cut up" The Longhorns? (rim shot) Chaminade has only won 7 times in this annual tourney and seems to be the gracious host more of than not, but every now and then they'll catch someone napping...this year it was the Longhorns.
Also a Phat Dap to Baylor center Britney Griner. You got to peep the video of her dunking…again! She has thrown down eight dunks in her storied career, one has to wonder how many she will dunk for her future pro team.
Im giving a pair of these too, one to Bill Belichick who just couldn't resist running up the score in beating the Colts Sunday, but at a terrible cost with Rob Gronkowski suffering a broken forearm as he was blocking on an extra point. Why the hell was Gronk blocking for an extra point and why was he on the field after the Pats had rung up 59 points? This will deprive QB Tom Brady of a critical offensive weapon for a number of weeks .
I have to give one also to Andrew Bynum, someone Ive always thought of as a chump. The would-be big man of the Philadelphia 76ers is rehabbing a knee problem but suffered a setback…how? He was bowling. Bowling? Ummm I cant think of something more stupid to have hurt yourself doing short of skydiving when you are trying to rehab your knee. I don’t know what is dumber him doing that or that he’s trying to emulate Don King. Broh, bust out them clippers and get the funky fresh fade...quickly.
I, as well as the good citizens of The Hoodwood wish you a prosperous and filling Thanksgiving! Until Next Post Fellow Sports Fans!