A fat fucker, drinking beer, watching a PGA event on TV, anywhere in the world, can watch the game and call up the PGA and tell them that one of the players violated a rule. Now mind you there are many PGA officials at every event and they know all the rules. So how come they have to wait until this fucker calls and tells them Tiger screwed up.

Simply put, the PGA should use the motto "What's laid is played." If you screw your card up, or don't put your ball back at the same spot, and no one notices tough shit.

 

Now that the Catholic cardinals have assembled their weapon of Mass Construction (c’mon, that was funny) we can move onto more important issues.  Like the PGA considering a ban on anchoring  putters. 

Now, I’m probably like most cats that have strolled the links waving a golf club in one hand, and a beverage in the other, in that I can hit the crap out of a golf ball given a solid driver, but my short game falls…a little short.  I’m known to drive the ball to the green in 2 strokes, and put it in the cup with no less than 6-more.  In short, I suck.  Bad.

And, frankly, I don’t have the temperament for golf.  The last time I went golfing, I was on hole 13 when I got so frustrated I wrapped my 9-iron around a tree.  Truly, I’m not kidding.  My family refuses to take me out to putt-putt.  I’m that bitter and angry that I can’t get the ball through the windmill that I’m a hazard to be around.

Getting back to the issue at hand, the PGA wants to consider a ban to take effect in 2016 on “belly putters” because they take too much skill out of the game.  Why?  Because an increasing number of tour members are using them.   According to the PGA website, not one of the top 20 golfers use an anchored putting stroke.  Seems to me that in and of itself undercuts their argument; these competitive cats see an advantage, they’d be on it like a boss.  They’re not. 

Now, you’re not likely to get me on the links any time soon; I broke the head off a brand new “Big Bertha” – on the first swing I took with it -  by driving it straight down: A $225 driver – with a sweet club cover and everything – down the tubes.  The head went further than the ball did.  Would an anchored putter help my game?  Seriously?  Psychiatric help might help my game, but a belly putter?  Not likely.  Does it help the pros by “taking the skill out” of the game?  I suppose over a long term, it could have a dumbing down effect – like the slam dunk vs. a charity stripe throw to a 7’1” Shaquille O’Neal – but seriously, the game is so skill driven and so competitive that if anchoring a putter to my belly would give me a fraction of a stroke difference over 13 tour appearances, I would do it.  That doesn’t seem to be happening.

But just because people increasingly use something, it doesn’t mean that it works.  I mean any 1980’s kid that wore Marithe Francois Girbaud inverse pleated pants knows that just because everyone is doing it, it doesn’t mean it works.  None of the Top 20 actually use one?  Probably not happening, it’s a matter of style.  The accusation it takes the skill out of the short game hasn’t been proven – if you’re going to ban something because it creates an advantage (real or perceived), you need to test it.  And that hasn’t been done.

Here’s the simple solution: take the top 100 golfers.  Randomly assign them to a belly putter vs. traditional putter groups and have them putt 1000 times.    Which group out performs the other?  Then debate the issue.  If the belly putters outperform, that gives you data with which to have a debate – not a perfect debate, I mean my experimental design has significant flaws, but some data (even flawed data) is better than no data.  That data is just not present in this discussion. 

So to the PGA I say, don’t be like the Luddites fighting the power of technological advancement: destroying the machines of progress – a futile fight.   Look at data, don’t just make a gut reaction because you don’t like the form.

Just don't dare ask him to pay an extra 5% in taxes or he will just take his ball and go home (or I guess to Florida or Texas).

You can certainly debate the merits (or lack thereof) on how our government spends our money, but by any reasonable measure the tax burden on our wealthiest citizens has been at historic lows.   At the same time, the Country has racked up $1.4 trillion in war debt and another $4 trillion in other spending as the U.S. (and the world) try to recover from a very poor economic stretch.    

So today, Phil groused about his taxes going up to what he claimed was over 60% which tells me a few things about the guy: (1) he has no clue what he really pays in taxes or he has the world's worst accountant; (2) like so many people in the elite strata, he has no clue how lucky he is; and, (3) he can't keep thoughts better left unsaid to himself.

Let's do a little math.  Phil raked in $50,000,000+ in 2012.  If he paid taxes like Mitt Romney say, he would have had to pay about $7,500,000 in Federal tax, about $4,000,000 in State tax and oh yeah - what really burns him, $6,000 in Social Security.  So out of $50,000,000 that leaves him with the paltry sum of about $39,499,994 to spend.     Under the new plan, he will have to pitch in an extra (at most) $5,000,000 so instead of having $40,000,000 to spend, he will have to deal with having only $35,000,000.  Boo Hoo.

Compare that with someone who walks on the other side of the ropes making say $75K per year who pays the same percentage of their income to Uncle Sam.  How can that be?  Well, they have about $10,000 in Federal, $4,000 in State and $4,000 in Social Security...$57K take home pay (a 29% tax burden - about the same as Phil).  In my book, there is a lot less to play with at $57K than $35 million.  

If you don't like how the government spends their money, that fine  - make your voice heard.  But go through the trouble of reading where your money actually goes.  There seems to be this thought that all of the tax revenue goes to freeloaders and people living off the government teat.  Over 60% of discretionary spending goes to our armed forces - anyone want to trim that?  You have to go through a big part of the budget before you come to the relatively small amount we pay to help those who are down on there luck.  We spend a whopping 1 - 2 % on science!  Whoa, put the brakes on the NIH budget (until you get cancer, then open the floodgates please).  

I like Phil - he seems like a genuine guy.  Just don't cry in public about how unfair the tax system is when you are living off the proceeds that those of us that are golf fans make possible for you.   Keep it to yourself, Phil.  You want to move to Florida so you can save a few bucks, go for it.  All the rest of your golfing buddies have done it.  If I could, I'd live in a state with no income tax too.  But I don't have that luxury like you.  We have had enough of insufferable spoiled athletes complaining about their millions while the rest of us sweat it out every frickin' day.  It is sad to add your name to that list.

  

"Everybody knows I'm the guy with two hearts," Compton replied. It's a story that has been told for the last three years, ever since the 31 year old Compton again defied logic, if not death, by getting a second heart transplant. He recieved this heart from former Chaminade Julienne and University of Dayton atlete Isaac Klosterman who was tragically killed riding a motorcycle in Palm Beach, Florida. Compton returned to playing gold only 5 months later to get through the 1st stage of Q-School.

His identity won' change anytime soon. He will always be the guy who after his second heart transplant said "I've been dead. Twice." And he wouldn't have it any other way. With all of the attention he receives it allows him to spread the word about organ transplants just like the heart he recived at the age of 12, and the second transplant on May 20, 2008. "The doctors are schocked and people in the transplant world are shocked. I'm shocked because I always said I would be on tour and play, but now it's a reality. My dream is finally coming true."

It is also hard to fathom for tall the people who have seen this story unfold as well. Charlie DeLucca, head of the Dade Amateur Golf Association in Miami remembers when Compton showed up to play and his parents asked if he could he could take a pull cart. DeLucca was skeptical, unaware that the boy had been diagnosed at age 9 with cardiomyopathy , an enlarging of the heart that hinders it's ability to pump blood. DeLucca thought that he would never see him again and Compton has proved otherwise. "He's not even supposed to be here, He just never lost his determination" DeLuccca said.

It has been suggested that his story was worthy of a movie and asked Compton who should play the elading role. His friends have always said that he looks like Paul Giamatti. Compton was quoted as saying "I don't think there will be a movie, I think movies..you have to have something that's maybe a little bit more unrealistic. Maybe if they make a fictional story and have me winning three U.S. Opens or something."

Meanwhile Compton is just rolling along doing his favorite thing in the world playing golf and soon to realizing a lifelong dream and it's an incredible story. Thanks to the AP for this story.

Special K
 

Can anyone tell me why Jim Gray is paid to interview anyone? It seems that he is always pissing someone off with the ridiculous questions that he asks. Fans dislike him, players in sports can't stand him...why is he still here? It is one thing to ask tough questions, it is entirely another for a reporter to attack his interviewee with such zeal. Now, I don't think that we should give athletes a pass...especially if they screwed up. But, get someone that is not such a prick to hold the athlete accountable. Here is the flap that Gray caused this week:

"Three things that you can always bank on; death, taxes, and Jim Gray getting into it with some athlete or coach.

The latest episode came on Thursday at Riviera, when Gray got in a heated argument with Dustin Johnson's caddie, to the point that The Golf Channel has removed Gray from its coverage this week from the Northern Trust Open.

According to USA Today's Michael McCarthy, Johnson's caddie went into a profanity-laced screaming match with Gray after he reported on The Golf Channel earlier that day that Johnson had landed a two-shot penalty for being late to the tee.

Johnson's caddie, Bobby Brown, took most of the heat for the late tee-time arrival, with Dustin even commenting after the round that he doesn't look at the time, leaving that up to the caddie." 

 By the way...Gray decided that the back 9 was the proper place to conduct an interview. Golfer don't need to concentrate, right...what a douche...

Johnson should have been on time, but busting his caddie's balls is just not necessary. I am glad to see that the Gold Channel has removed Gray from this week's tournament. There is some discussion if he will be looking for new employment. I have a great idea. Instead of a suit, I think that Jim Gray should have to wear this shirt any time he does an interview:

I am sure that the shirt will fit him perfectly!

Now don't get me wrong... Lefty (Hefty) is a decent hacker... Just not when it comes to the Ryder Cup. This fat bastard needs to just stay home and watch on TV like the rest of us. Cory Pavin should have to grab Phil's bag (giggity) and play the rest of the weekend as punishment... Left handed... If the USA losses the Ryder Cup, I say ban Lefty from Ryder play... He just doesn't have it.

Ol' Phil is now a whopping 10-16-6. (win-loss-half) Since 2004, he is a grand 2-11-3. Hey Phil... Just say NO next time someone asks if you want to be on a Ryder Cup team. Sack-up, be a man, and know when to walk away and save yourself some more embarrassment. Give me more rookies and guys that can play! I don't care if it's Phil. Everyone was worried about Tiger and what he was going to do during Cup play. I am pretty sure no one saw the wheels on Hefty's cart coming off. Sure, he did well during the regular 'season'... But it doesn't necessarily translate to good Ryder Cup play.

Get your floaties, Phil... It's a long swim...

Speaking of embarrassment... How about those 'uniforms' or 'wardrobe' malfunctions created by Lisa Pavin, whom has dubbed herself the 'Captainess'. Nothing says 'Cluster-fuck' like having to scramble to the souvenir stand, mid-play, to buy up all the rain gear because yours doesn't repel water. Wait, what? Yeah, that's right... The brought rain gear that doesn't fucking work... Hey, Lisa. Stay out of the sporting goods store! Just because your husband doesn't have the sack to tell you to sit down and shut up.. I will. But the 'uniforms' are pretty... Yeah, pretty fucking horrible. The rain suits work well for fashion... Just as long as it DOESN'T FUCKING RAIN... Thankfully, for your sake, Lisa, they suspended play for half the day because the course was under water. It's England, even I know it rains like a mother-fucker the first part of fall.

Hey, Sully... Have we ever had a FEMALE winner for Tool Of The Week??? I have a nomination for you... This 'gash' (thanks Beeze) could single handedly cause the USA to lose the Ryder Cup because of her 'wardrobe-malfunction'. Get your floaties, Lisa... It's a long swim...

Any other golf tourney, I would have slept through. But since it is in Europe, I get to watch it live when I get home from work at 3am... Thank you ESPiN for getting something right in my little world.

S.

What can that player say other than...

Meanwhile across the river in Paramus, New Jersey the Barclay portions Fedex Cup series ended with Tiger Woods well out of even the top ten.

Then there's the issue of the Ryder Cup. Although he is still ranked the number one player in the world due to several flukes, the Cup team needs people who can win and who have demonstrated that they are currently "game tough". That does not apply to Woods. Were I the sort who bets (and I've been known to lay a "friendly" wager or two") then I would bet he's playing hoping for the victory that will redeem not only his reputation but his game. Thus far, the best tournament for him was the Masters but since then, it's been a catastrophic ride downhill. It's my belief that unless he can find a victory somewhere and soon, his career grows closer to its conclusion. As of now he probably would not feel he could retire with dignity, but one win might be enough to salve his pride. Or he might feel the game was turning to him and better things were ahead. Impossible to know..

And the end of the day, Woods is nine strokes behind leader, Martin Laird, Dustin Johnson of PGA penalty fame is in second. Could Woods win? Mathematically it's possible, but, as said during playoff time in football, he'd need considerable "help" from other players.

It's hard to pick one of the ones he didn't win could have been the most important to win and I'll select Augusta. It was the one that was tailored to his needs professionally and psychologically. It was his first tournament and, had he won it, that would have clearly said, I'm back, I've lost nothing. But then he continued on to fail to win any of the others, many of which had him as the defending champion.

And I could pop Jack Nicklaus for saying that Woods would never win as many majors as he had by a certain age. I've had to be around Mr. Nicklaus on too many occasions and know what a sour, difficult person he can be. The day he won his first Masters, although there were smiles on the faces of those doing the presenting, many more members and USGA Executive Committee members chose to absent themselves.

To a lesser degree, Mr. Woods has personality problems that are not often visible to the public.  He's mastered the art of seeming civil but few touring pros would say he was a friend of theirs. They, too, would be civil abut it, but that's about all. And, lets face grim facts, when a man is winning 25% of the tournaments he enters, that leaves far fewer for everyone else. Could jealousy be a factor? Don't bet against it.

As the months and the major tournaments scrolled on, so did his losses. The finale was the PGA Tournament which as about as bad  a showing as he'd made.

So he needs to win....something. But by now, he needs more than one tournament and, preferably,  more like two or three in a row. That's about the only way to substantively prove his game and his mind are back in the sport.

Lets see on Sunday where he is. A win means a little something but another loss just forces him deeper into the crater.

Golf.   I sit here and wonder where these idiots in the media get off demanding that Tiger talk about his personal life.  Personally, I could give a rats ass about his personal life and who he had “relations” with.  You know what I care about when it comes to Tiger?  G-O-L-F, nothing else!  I have enough things going on in my life without having to look at blogs of so-called professionals demanding that Tiger open up about it.  FOR THE LAST TIME YOU HACKS - I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!!!  You know what’s worse?  Dragging Ms. Nordgren into it – hasn’t she been humiliated enough?    Where is the compassion for her and the children?  These kids didn't ask for this garbage, yet they are the ones hurt by this - NOT Tiger!!!

Tennis.  What's wrong with this picture?  Yeah, the male is on the downside of his career and the female isn't even playing.  That's your dominant players in Tennis.  Memo to Tennis - it's time for new players to break-through!!!  We need competition and we need Americans.  Lord, how I wish for the days of Borg, Connors, McEnroe, Evert, Navratliova, and King.

How is it that we've gotten to the week before the U. S. Open and we have yet to hear anything about what I consider to be the best Tennis out there?  Oh yeah, that's right - the media doesn't give a care about it unless it's Wimbledon.  Serena Williams not being in it hurts - or does it?  This is a chance for somebody new to shine - let's embrace that, and hope there's no controversy like last year (remember Serena making threats?).

While I'm at it, nobody can tell me that we can't have great American born Tennis players on the Men's side.  I really want to get back into this sport, but man we have to have something or someone to root for. 

Thoughts???